I self harm last night and share it on Facebook/Intragram

Yesterday was an okay day, then all sudden I got paranoid about my money issues, my dad asking for my bank information ( he was trying to help) then I went off, punch my head, craw into fiddle prosition and cry. I told my sister, cousin end friends that I wanted to commit suicide. My parent said I was mental abuse, and post a video of me punching my head on the Facebook/ Instagram.

I was almost year clear from self harm, I went to two therpist, did CBD gummies, read DBT book and did boxing. But still feel good to punished myself as a failure. I get some good attention, which make me abusive. The only person I truly hate is myself. I’m very toxic person, I’m weak and hurt my love one. I put a lot pressure on people to make me feel good. I don’t if I can change.

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Hi @Metalskater1990 - I am glad you posted again. I hope you are safe right now, it sounds like you are really worried and have a lot of strong feelings about what is going on in your life. Sometimes when we self harm and get attention from it, it increases the feeling that we are doing the right thing. I am really sorry you are struggling with that.

You put in a lot of hard work to improve yourself, but it doesn’t make the struggle any easier. We are here for you, please let us know how we can support you.

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hi there, i am really glad you are speaking up about how you feel that is a good thing. everyone has different triggers as to how they react with certain people and topics but it’s not something that you have to beat yourself up over your family understands what you go through and it’s not something you can just stop it’s okay to have bad ending to a good day you are loved and you are cared for and about never feel that you are a burden to anyone

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