Im in a very dark place right now. And I would like nothing more than to just end it all. Nothing is worth staying
I don’t think they wanna talk to me anymore. They got bored
There can be many reasons why your friend has not replied to you. Last time, they were just busy and you said they still cared about you.
For me, I go to the bad side of things, so I can understand why you are. Most of the time, those bad thoughts are not reality and our friend will reply with a valid excuse.
They haven’t given you any reason to think they don’t want to be your friend anymore. I bet the first chance they get, you’ll get a reply.
They didn’t even bother saying hi anymore and when I wanted to continue the conversation, they went offline.
Sometimes people forget because they have other things going on. They have been busy right? They could have gone offline for a lot of different reasons that could have nothing to do with your friendship. They could have lost their wifi for an example.
End the sadness. End the misunderstanding. End the fear of being alone. Take another look at the repeating thoughts, and consider other ways to perceive life. Every day offers an opportunity to see things from a different perspective. You are growing in experience and wisdom. Six months from now, you’ll be a different person - in a good way. You’ll be able to look back and say, “I’m glad I figured that out.”
I know that sounds undoable, but you’d be surprised at what you can do when taking issues one small step at a time.
You aren’t alone! Others may be distracted, and unable to be there for you in the moment, but that doesn’t mean they don’t care. Besides, we care.
As much as people need each other, there’s also a great need to be your own friend, and able to be comfortable with alone times. That comfort can come with the realization that others would be there for you if they could, also as time goes on, there will be countless opportunities to connect with others.
There are also lots of people in your future who will really, really want to connect with you.
It does involve emotional risk, and being “out there,” with others. Along with that, be the kind of friend you wish to have.
With all the ups and downs, the times when love is shared, makes it all worthwhile.
I just feel awful, I wish we hadn’t met. I’m like a burden. And they don’t need that burden. I made a mistake. I’ve ruined someone’s life again
This is a see saw you’re on, and I hope that you remember how great you will feel when they do eventually reply.
This is the fear of rejection and abandonment you’re feeling. when you don’t hear from them, you think they hate you or want to leave you.
When they return, you’re comforted and you remember that they do care.
In the “inbetween” times when they’re not in contact, you have to remind yourself that while they’re away, they haven’t changed, (it’s been around a couple of days?) and how they do have other things to do in life - like school, homework, family events. These are things they have to do, and that could be why they aren’t in contact right now.
But this is the see saw swinging down, while you wait for the other person to hop on and bring back balance to your life. But you also can’t depend on this person to do that alone. We’ve talked about them being a bit younger, and that you have to respect their space as well because kids that age need to have their space to just be alone and unwind, right?
You have to self-soothe, and comfort yourself, and find things to do to wait out the time until they return.
Try to remind yourself what brought you joy and distract yourself with that. I think you want the fear and the pain to end because you can’t talk to this person and that hurts SO much. But it’s temporary. Reread some of your posts, and you will see the pattern as well. Nothing beats evidence! You will see how your past responses have been, and you can use that to selfsoothe!! Look at your happy posts, and remind yourself of the reason why they were away, and use that to help self soothe yourself. Hope this helps!
You may have upset or disappointed someone, but I can’t imagine you’d do anything that could ruin someone’s life. People either accidentally or purposely hurt each other. Those are actually steps toward wisdom and compassion, along with lessons in forgiveness.
If you’re a burden, those who are burdened by you are honored by your faith in them, and you’re helping them become better people.
Sometimes we’re burdens. Other times we share our strength. No doubt, you have strength to share, and have shared it.
Accept and forgive yourself, as you would others. Your mistakes are like rungs on a ladder, and each one brings you higher, because you’re growing and your vision is increasing.
You are not a burden. And whether someone chooses to interact with you or not, regardless of their reasons, it is their decision and responsibility (unless it is circumstantial, like the example provided with the wifi), not yours.
Whenever I feel like a burden, caught myself spiraling and doubt my relationships with others, I like to watch this short video to hear some fundamental reminders again about this “I am a burden” belief:
What you are sharing and expressing in this thread is about how you perceive yourself and feel about yourself. What are some proof in your past experiences that completely contradict those thoughts? What are the things that people value in you and that you value in yourself?
Not having a response from this person is obviously acting as an emotional trigger for you. It’s okay to slow down, acknowledge how you feel and take action against those beliefs, because they are not based on truth.
You have worth and you are loved. Each relationship is a different experience, but none of them will ever define you or condition your entire existence. You are a person beyond the relationships and connections you have, and it’s okay if you have yet to meet yourself fully.
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