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I’ve been so close to ending it these days


#1

I am currently crying as I write this new topic. I’ve been wanting to end it these past few days because everything is going against me. The person who I tell myself that I need to walk away from, I end up going back to. She gives me reason after reason that she doesn’t love me and I feel like I have to beg her for love. She says she does but her actions say something else. She gives me anxiety and honestly every time she gives me reason to beilive she still has communication with the other guy she hurt me with. It’s been 8 months that I’ve tried to fix this, I think she changes when she tells me but then her actions Provence something else and I end up hurt again. In this week she has managed to lie about certain things, she has hit me and thrown stuff directly at me, and has managed to keep me outside her house for 3 hours , when she got upset about how scared I was to try it again. She never let me in or anything but I stood there because I wanted to work on it. I don’t know what to do! I feel hopeless and alone. Why can’t I walk away. She knows exactly what to say in order for her to flip it on me and make me feel like the bad guy. I know there are plenty of people out there, but sometimes I feel like she’s the only one. Maybe I’m just blind but I feel different around her, but I know that this isn’t healthy for me this is toxic and I need to walk away. I just need strength because she knows what to say in order for me to come back. I hate this. She makes me hate myself. She makes me feel like I’m not enough. I feel like shit. I feel useless. I’m not happy anymore. I got back to my depression. I got back to drinking. I don’t work out anymore. I hardly eat. I get anxiety. I smoke again. I hate this life. I want it to be better. I want to be HAPPY AGAIN.


#2

Wow, you’re being manipulated, HARD. She absolutely does not love you, she loves to torture you. When I was about 14, I was sent to live with a foster family whose mother did those very same things to me. She was the type of person who got their rocks off on making me feel like a monster, and this girl you’re in love with sounds like the same type of person as that. My best advice? RUN AWAY. Get as far away from that evil vespa-woman as you can, she’s only going to keep you under her thumb if you continue to pursue her. She is never going to be “the one” no matter how hard you crush on her, because to her, you’re nothing but a toy to be played with. Trust me. you will be much happier without her in your life. And yes, you might have to be alone for a while before you find somone who will truly love you, but it’s gonna be a fair sight better than remaining under your abusive girlfriend’s heel. Nobody deserves to be treated the way you are, you are worth so much more than your horrible gf would have you believe. Don’t let her win. Be strong, friend. If a guy like me can survive that kind of Hell-on-Earth situation, you can do it, too. <3


#3

@erick_ocampo ,

Ending your life is not an answer. Its the only thing that will hurt the people who care about you. She is not good enough for you. saying not good enough is harsh but to be honest you diserve someone better for you. you are loved friend you are not alone. wanting to be with her breaks your bad habbits? i know you want to get better but you need (not necesarrily) to help you be yourself and be better. you can do it and we believe in you.


#4

Hey Erick,

I think you’re actually on the right track. “I’ve been wanting to end it these past few days” is actually the perfect statement if you just replace “it” with “this relationship”…ultimately, it sounds like that’s a big source of your pain.

  1. To close the door entirely, you’ve got to block her from everything. Phone, social media, email, everything.
  2. Delete every reminder of her from your phone (all photos), every reminder from your socials (all photos and tags), every everything.

Don’t overcomplicate it. You want to end it? Great! End it with this girl, and get your life back, bro.

-Nate


#5

Hi Erick, thanks for sharing.

You don’t have to beg for her love. No one has to. Love it’s not something we have to buy or ask for: I have a friend in the same situation and she just keeps falling to the same old tricks.

It’s hard, but you have to walk away. You deserve more than this, believe me. No one has the right to make you feel like this.

Love you

Pioggia :sunflower:


#6

Erick,

We love you man. And a lot of us have been in something like this before. Let’s start by saying youre absolutely phenomenal and ABSOLUTELY worth more than this…

Here is what we said…


#7

She is the poisoned apple my friend. A witch coaxed you to eating that apple and you think you need that apple to not feel the hunger anymore. It put you in a dream state blinding you to the poison that is rampaging through your body.

I would advise you to stay away from this apple. Yet the choice has always been yours.
You do you.


#8

Did you just make a Snow White reference ? Thanks for reaching out btw