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I want to be alone


#1

lately, i’ve been wanting to keep to myself, not talk to anyone, and just be alone with my thoughts. i recently started to engage in self-destructive behaviors that i hadn’t have done in over three years. it makes me frustrated that i cant pull myself together and be happy for everyone else around me. i feel like i am always the problem, and everyone around me is victimized by my behavior. nothing ever seems good enough. my thought consume me in waves and its so hard to pull myself back out. sometimes i think im meant to live this life, i deserve the pain and suffering i put myself through with my dark thoughts. im better off secluded and alone so i dont hurt anyone. am i better off dead?

maybe.


#2

@middleknuckle

You are not better off dead. Your life has meaning. It’s okay to feel like you want to be alone. Those are real human feelings. I feel that way too many times in my life. The truth is you are not alone. This community has been in similar seasons as you do. Don’t think you are a burden. You are loved. If you want to share more, this forum is open. Thank you for being honest.


#3

@middleknuckle You are not better off dead. I know this because I struggle with these exact patterns of thoughts and I’ve been going out of my way to find what makes me happy and gives me a sense of purpose in life, and I would encourage the same of you. For me, it has taken some effort and risk to find the people who I can turn to and be truly vulnerable with but now they have inspired me to find more value and love for myself and my life. Everything you’ve listed in your post are some of the most common lies we tell ourselves, they’re simply not true; you are worth it, you’re strong, you’re loved, and you’re not alone.

Hold fast friend.