I want to kill myself

currently just don’t know anymore. i found out my internet bill is 500 dollars because my card declined in december, nobody called me about it and they didnt retry the card. i have to pay off my credit card bill in order to pay it and my dad still wants me to pay for his stuff. im tired. i don’t want to deal with this, every single turn someone wants something from me. my dad expects me to pay all of his bills while he spends al his fucking money on ciggarrets or alcohol. i can’t take it anymore. i just want to die. i don’t want to be here. i can’t do this


Hey there,

Thank you for sharing this here and being so open. It sounds like you’re really dealing with a lot and everything is just so very overwhelming right now. You weren’t notified your card declined and are now expected to pay it off right away all while your dad is expecting you to still pay for his stuff. I can’t imagine how stressful that all has been. It sounds like you’re definitely at the end of your rope and just want it all to stop.

Know that even the most overhwlmeing, stressufl and darkest of times cannot last forever and just because this will not last forever does not mean what you are experiencing is not very real or valid. It takes it’s toll and most likely feels like you can’t see past any of this. I would encourage you to keep reaching out here and know that we believe in you and your ability to get through this. To get through all of the stressors and frustrations and anxieties you are faced with right now. You are so dearly loved, valued and worthy of life my friend. We truly do believe in you. Here are also some really great resources that I would encourage you to check and and utilize and hope they can be of help to you. We see you and we hear you. :black_heart:

Resources | HeartSupport

Crisis text line - text HOME to 741741

Suicide hotline - 1-800-273-8255

National suicide prevention chat - http://chat.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/LifelineChat.aspx

Hold Fast,

those are all american. i cant even get rhough to them. whatever

Where are you from? I’d be more than happy to research resources that you can access.

canada, vancouver…

Ok great! Thank you for letting me know. Here are a couple I have been able to find that you should be able to access.

Text HOME to 686868 in Canada to text with a trained Crisis Responder

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Hi. Thank you for sharing this!
I just want to say, I know how it feels to have a parent spend all their money on drugs and crap like that. I was adopted into my current family when I was 3 weeks old, but I learned that my birth parents hardly took care of me and my birth siblings. They’d just use the government money that they got that would usually be for us kids and spend it on games, alcohol, and drugs.

Anyway, what I suggest is maybe talking to your dad about your situation and try to tell him that you’re unable to pay his bills because of your own bills.

I’m here for you, friend. If you ever need to talk, feel free to message me :heart:

i just told my dad i wanted to die and he screamed in my face “no you don’t youu want to be happy”

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I- That’s completely outrageous. Parents should care about if their child doesn’t want to live. He has no right telling you how you should be feeling. I wanna go over there and give him a big talking to and give you a big hug. I’m so sorry : (

he did that to me last time and i left in tears, he threatened to kill himself last time when i left. he doesn’t care about how i feel unless i’m putting a smile on my face

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I don’t have that much going on, but I can understand what its like to feel so stressed out you want to die.

If your dad is threatening to kill himself if you leave, DO NOT LISTEN TO HIM. It’s very common for abusive and toxic people to say that to get control over their victims, and its unlikely they will actually go through with it. If it’s better for you to get out and go away from him. Do it. If its unhealthy for you to keep in contact with him, cut him off. Do what’s best for you. It’s your life and you should live happily.


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