I want to kms

From dimos_chrys: i want to kms============

From dimos_chrys: i want to kms============

From dimos_chrys: i want to kms everyting in my life lately is just trash my life is a joke, im deppresed, im cutting myself, im having trouble opening up, i hate my life, i have social anxiety which means i hate myself and think others hate me too for expample if i do something with people around im thinking that they are dissapointed in me and that they hate me, at this point idk what to do, i jumped in front of a train and my friends were there and pulled me off the tracks

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hi there @dimos_chrys,

Sounds like there are a lot of things going on at the same time. I’m glad your friends were there and kept you safe. That shows me that there are indeed people who care about you and support you. The negative things we tell ourselves in ours brains can be very loud sometimes, and make us believe that no-one cares.

But I know for the fact that there are at least two set of people who care about YOU - your friends, and us here in this community.
Are you getting any help presently? Or seen a medical professional who can help you? Sometimes we need meds to help balance the chemicals in our brains, sometimes we need some strategies and explanations for what’s going on and why we do things a certain way.
If you are in danger, you need to reach out to local services or to call a hotline so that they can provide some comfort and relief to you, or intervene if you need help. We are here to listen if talking through things, emotionally dumping your burden here, opening up in a safe anonymous space will help you, you’re in the right spot. You matter, and your life matters. Stay with us, and we’ll be here for you through this. You’re not alone friend, you have a whole community here with you.

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From dimos_chrys: no i havent been getting help recently or ever i havent opened up to anyone and i havent been takings pills or meds, i know im too young to have suicidical thoughts but im not trolling, i havent called a hotline i havent done anything i just want to die instantly no pain i wanna jump of a building

From themanekineko: Ashmore I am extremely sorry for the inappropriate message that came through here. We do our best to try to keep people safe and sometimes a person with ill intentions comes through.
I hope that you know that people who say and do these things probably need some support themselves. What I do know is that nobody should ever talk to you that way or say those things to you. I want to encourage you to reach out to a support line. Because feeling so hurt and lost is painful and very very hard to overcome by yourself. I want to link some resources if you ever need them. <#423176381141090304>
I once again am so very sorry you were witness to someone’s bad intentions.

From dimos_chrys: its getting worse idk for how .uch longer i can keep going

From mesh: I would encourage you to not attempt any form of self harm. You have lived all these years and worked so hard to build a life for yourself, don’t throw it all away, even if you don’t think so there are people out there who love and care for you and who don’t want to see you go at such a young age. For example, your friends who pulled you away from the train tracks. I also struggle with opening up, and one good trick that works is writing down your feelings on a piece of paper or on the computer. Trust me, you can make it through this, you are worth so much and people love you.

From dimos_chrys: no=======================

From dimos_chrys: nobody does==============

From dimos_chrys: no they dont love me=====

From dimos_chrys: and trust me if you read my mind for 1 min you would want to put a bullet through it

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I just want to say that people of any age can have these thoughts and they are always distressing anf awful. Is there a trusted adult you can talk to?

Sometines there are things that make us think horrible things, and its hard to stop. Youre being really brave sharing here, and i want to acknowledge that. We are hear to listen if you want to share whats going on in your mind.

And you ARE loved by us, for existing. I know things are really hard right now, but please keep talking to us, and try to talk to the people in your life. There might be someine who will listen who will care, who can help you get help.

And you can call a helpline or a hotline, being a minor doesnt bar you from getting help. Same wirh emergency services. If your thouggt are unbearable, it is okay to call for help.

From dimos_chrys: no there isnt an adult i can talk to, i dont even want to tell my friends the reasons i want to do the things i want to do, i just want to die instantly from a gunshot to the head or falling of a building

we’re here for you.

Do you know your friends’ parents? I hear you friend, but life can be more than just this hard things you’re feeling right now. You have to talk to someone who can help or give support if you’re acting on those feelings.
Do you have a school counselor?

In addidtion to ^^ what I asked above, you are always freely able to share here, there are many of us who will read and respond and care. I know it is so very difficult right now, so please share here and maybe that can help you feel a bit heard and feel a bit loved. You matter.

From dimos_chrys: i want to kms everyting in my life lately is just trash my life is a joke, im deppresed, im cutting myself, im having trouble opening up, i hate my life, i have social anxiety which means i hate myself and think others hate me too for expample if i do something with people around im thinking that they are dissapointed in me and that they hate me, at this point idk what to do, i jumped in front of a train and my friends were there and pulled me off the tracks

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I understand you i am the quiet one in the friend group and feel left out constantly, do you know any triggers its really helpfull for us and you to find these out for us to help you and for you to understand yourself more,

Thank you for opening up here we really appreciate it