I’ve felt this way for the past 5-6 years with no one to turn to for help. Had my 18th birthday couple months ago, and it was the worst birthday I’ve had yet. Now I have the responsibilities of adulthood pinned onto me so quickly. I don’t have a direction in life and no one, not even my immediate family, gives a damn. In fact, I think they have grudges against me. I’m so tired of trying and being told that it will get better in time. It doesn’t, not for me at least. Another thing, it makes me furious when people tell me that I’m not alone in this. Yeah, no shit Sherlock. As a matter of fact, it makes me feel even more like trash since all these other people get help with their situations and I’m just left in the dirt, like I don’t even exist. Sometimes I wish I didn’t exist. I don’t think I’ll kill l myself because I don’t have the strength to do that. I just wish death would come to me when I’m unaware, like when I’m asleep or something.
I see you Ph0enix – I believe your existence is destined for a greater purpose.
Only from this one post, you have inspired me.
I can relate to your sudden onset of adult responsibility and the struggle to find a direction in life is very familiar.
There’s several things here, that I relate to on a personal level and honestly, I would consider you inspiring!
You’re putting your feelings out there and seeking support, which is something more than I have done for myself so far.
Without knowing it, you’ve helped me.
So I want to return the favour, you are so special to me & I really care about what you have to say.
I don’t have friends to turn to locally & understand you’re tired of hearing “you’re not alone” or “it will get better”…
…So instead, I want to offer my friendship to you, in hopes that you know, I sincerely want to help you.
I believe, you exist for a solid purpose & your story has shown, YOU have the ability to help others that are going through similar struggles as yourself.
I have recently taken up meditation & although it doesn’t stop the pain, I have found it to be soothing on my thought process and helps to relieve the tension in my head for a little while.
Sending you positive thoughts and wishing you the most wonderful day.