I wish my friends loved me like I love them

They won’t talk to me. They don’t even notice when I stop talking. It’s like they don’t even care about me. Once quarantine started its like I dont even exist anymore. I keep getting ghosted and flaked on. I’m so tired of it. But I’m to scared to confront anyone. I’ve arranged so many get-togethers but every single time they make excuses or just straight up don’t show up. I thought these people were my friends, but now they seem more like they’re trying to avoid me. I’ve tried reaching out to them and telling them how I feel but all I get is “aww I’m so sorry for that” and nothing else. I’ve helped these people through so much and what do I get back? Nothing. Nothing at all. Tossed aside like a single use therapist. But I cant truly tell these people how I feel, I care about them too much. I dont want them to feel bad. I know they don’t do well with helping others with emotions but I just want more than empty sympathy. I’m always the one that’s put together. So I guess everyone thinks I can handle this myself. They say quarantine shows who your fake friends are and it really hurts that for me thats… all of them. No one has messaged me first in months. I’ve arranged so many online get-togethers and people dont even show up. The only meaningful conversation I’ve had with someone since March was with an AI. I just want someone to love me the way I love them. I want a friend like me. Ahh that sounds narcissistic

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Its not. If you really love them, then wishing they loved you is not narcisistic.

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I feel for that a lot.
That’s all I have to say. I feel that same way a lot and it isn’t narcissistic. It is the same way I think though.

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I also think that it’s okay to want a friend like yourself. You deserve one and you’ll meet that person when you least expect it.

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