Im a mess

There are a couple of you who are already aware of this and this is not a public information film for everyone its just me hoping really that this will help (I don’t think it will but I am giving it a shot)
So here it is, Im pre menopausal its called peri menopause, I have other names for it but I wont be rude.
I have days when

  1. I don’t recognise myself
  2. I can’t stand being around myself
  3. I become everything I can’t stand in others, I whinge, I complain, I get angry, I say awful things and then I cry a lot.
    I have been the one who people go to when they need some reasoning, when they need to go over something and they need the ear of someone who will not jump the gun and over react and now im one of them - but not every day. OHHH no not every day, you dont know when its gonna happen, it wants to surprise you, it wants to wait until you are feeling slightly more secure in yourself then whack you round the head when you are not looking.
    I don’t like this at all, I didnt sign up for this.
    Anyway if I bite anyones head off in the next 10 years here, sorry its not my fault. I do love you all today but tomorrow anything is possible. xxxx
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My dear friend

Everything you are going thru is normal and a process. It sucks and we suffer big time for this time in our lives and it’s NOT fair. I’m sorry you’re struggling so much. Talk to your doctor because there are treatments you can try. Supplements and different products are out there for you.

I went thru a couple years of non stop worry, crying for a whole day and lashing out. On top of the already roller coaster of emotions I experience. Not feeling like myself and wondering if I could endure what I was going thru. Could my partner endure it etc. Not seeing any end in sight. I was a horrible mess for sure.

Good thing about all this is that it’s temporary. We all go thru this in different severities, but it does fade. I promise. Hot flashes might linger for longer but the emotional part does subside.

I found some tips and info for you to check out. We can talk more if you want later :hrtlegolove:

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Oh my friend,

YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN A MESS! You are one of the most amazing people I have ever known. Yes, this is something that you WILL overcome and it may take some time…but you can do it. All of those emotions are valid, just like the ones on the other side of the coin. Take it one day at a time. Teach Holly a new trick or two. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being a guiding light to SO many in this community. You are appreciated so much.

-StarFox :yellow_heart:

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Hello Lisa,
you are one of the kindest hearts i have ever met. In this short time i am here, i gained so much
motivation and energy and you are one the main reasons. I am really enjoying the SWAT 2, with everyone of you all here. Thank you all of SWAT 2, you are all very kind and great human beings and good hearts. Like this whole community.
How you welcomed me in this group and also comforted me to go a step higher gives me a lot. A lot more you can’t imagine. You make this world a better place, this community and everyone of us.
Take little steps, take your time. It is human. We are in this together and we are also here for you.
We care about you, we love you, feel hugged my friend
Greetings

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As always @Mystrose you are such an amazing support to me, I don’t know what I would do without you sometimes and thank goodness you know what this is like. lol
I will have a read of that blog later for sure thank you and thank you for you enduring patience. love you my friend. xx
@StarFox I love you!! i am grateful for you and your words and with support with that, I guess I can get through anything (this is todays mood lol) Thank you for always being my friend. Im forever grateful that I have you in my life. xxx
@Aardvark What can I say to you my friend?? Your reply bought tears to my eyes! That was so so kind to read coming from somone that I only met a couple of weeks ago but I see you and feel such pride at how you have grown in such a short time, you are an incredible human being and are going from strength to strength on a daily basis and if all I had to do was welcome you in then it was the best thing I could have done. I do feel hugged thank you and consider it returned and yourself congratulated. Thank you Aardvark. xx

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Oh Lisa, your feelings are completely valid and understandable. Please don’t feel guilty if you are in a bad mood. Hormones running wild can take quite a toll on our well-being, our bodies can be such meanies sometimes. :hrtlegolove: You have the right to complain, you have the right to be angry, you have the right to cry as much as you feel like, and you also have the right to say the wrong things. Nobody expects you to be perfect, you are “just” human, but you are such a wonderful human being. Know that you are loved and cherished.

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That’s a heavy thing to go through, and I’m so sorry you’re going through it. I promise you that you’re not alone. I have some beautiful women in my life who have experienced the same things, and it’s been something they’ve bravely been open about too.

You would be so surprised just how much of an impact hormones play in emotions. They directly impact the central and periphery sensors in a part of our brain and the endocrine system, and going through the process of menopause really throws out the hormone balance.
So while you’re asking why you’re feelings these feelings and don’t feel in control of them, well you’re not always. Sometimes it’s okay to blame it on the hormones. I think people have given it a bad rap because when someone does something overly violent or overly reactive it’s always “she’s hormonal” or “she’s on her period”. Yes we do control ourselves for the most part, but sometimes we just have to have a good cry and know it’s okay to be hormonal.

I love you very much and I do hope that you have a lovely weekend for yourself. X

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