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Belongs to: Therapist gets Sober by Tool
Im fighting alcoholism bad…ive been sober 3 different times and keep relapsing…i wanna be sober but keep failing
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Hey there!
First off I just want to say thank you for being open with us here, we appreciate it and don’t take it for granted. I believe that sharing your feelings and what you have been through can help others feel less alone, so once again thank you for being open with us here.
Although I do not struggle with alcoholism, I do struggle with self destructive tendencies where I self injure. To an extent, I understand how you feel. I know how it is when you just want to feel something, or you need something you KNOW will make you feel a certain way, even just for a little while. I am so sorry this is a battle you must fight, you don’t deserve this pain.
Something I was told in the past that has really helped me is when we relapse, we are not failing. We make it so far, and we learn things on the way, wee improve along the way. Even though we relapse, that does not take away all that you have accomplished, and how far you have come. I know it is not easy, but please don’t see your relapse as failure. You have come so so far and that is something to be proud of, I am proud of you.
Over time I have found some things that have helped me, for instance with my therapist I learned of a technique that is like waiting it out. Basically, the thoughts and feelings you have will only last for so long, so if you can wait out those thoughts or emotions you are having, it is less likely that you will relapse or do the negative thing. It is easier said than done, but at times it helps thinking about it. It is like, trying to remind myself to take it slow, live in the moment, don’t think about tomorrow or next week or next month, the only moment that matters is now. I have been trying to do that a lot lately with many instances in life, and I personally find it to be somewhat helpful.
Please know you are not alone in this fight friend, we are always here to listen, or be a shoulder to lean on.
It is great that you want to be sober; I think the want for something is a very big reason to keep going. I know it gets hard, I have been there on my bathroom floor just sobbing, trying to be quiet so no one knows. Life can get really hard sometimes, and we find ways to cope that make us feel okay, or help us feel again. At times those ways of coping are not healthy, but just know there are healthy ways of coping that you can learn, that can give you that same feeling in a healthier way, maybe even a better feeling.
Friend, I believe in you, you are doing amazing. Your relapse is not failure, remember how far you have come, how much you have learned.
Sending love,
Lys