so for a while i’ve been struggling. i know i’ve been quiet for a while and i’m sorry for that. back in december i think it was i wrote out a suicide plan. then in february i ripped it up with the help of a really good friend cheering me on. but maybe a couple weeks later i wrote it again. the date, place, time, all of it is the same as before. and i haven’t ripped this one out yet. part of me doesn’t want to. part of me is looking forward to the day that the paper has on it. there’s also the part of me that knows i shouldn’t go through with it. but sadly the part that’s louder is the part that wants it. i don’t feel worth it anymore. i don’t feel like i’m supposed to be here anymore. i’m sorry guys. i thought i was okay, but i’m crashing harder than ever before.
I was feeling really down today and also posted a thread. I wrote down in my journal everything that I was feeling. It helped me vent and clear my thoughts on paper.
I know you still have the will to live. Instead of writing a plan to end it. You can write a plan to survive.
I LOVE YOU.
I APPRECIATE YOU.
I CHERISH YOU.
I LOVE SEEING YOU AROUND.
Seriously, I always love seeing you come into chat. And guess what? You ARE supposed to be here.
I’m really sorry that things are feeling crummy right now. But Sarah, we love you. We care for you. So much.
Stay strong sweetheart