I have basically ruined my life with my family and everyone. I constantly feel sad and scared that no one cares about me and imma just die. I basically ruined my relationship with my parents because i took alot of pills and od and went to jail at the end of it all and i cant even be home more then 3 hours without feeling like im a fuck up or mistake and i dont know what to do. i just feel as if i did die no one would notice or care that it happened and i would just be another number.
I can’t imagine the weight you’re feeling, but if there is anything I have learned about feeling similar to this, you are NOT a fuck up or a mistake. You matter so much and your life is valuable. Feeling like this can be overwhelming and feel isolating. Know that you are not alone and absolutely would be missed. We need you, you’re a part of the Heartsupport family. Sometimes family and friends fall short of what we need of them, but that doesn’t you mean you aren’t supported or valued somewhere else. Please stay. Please keep reaching out. I’m proud of you for opening up here and hope that you will continue to talk with us. We are here to support you through it all. Hang in there.
I know this will sound stupid at first because we don’t know each other and writings can seem impersonal, but if you die we would notice and you’ll be missed. Really. Because you matter and we sincerely care about you. We want you to feel better and to stay safe. As @Stafflower said: just stay with us. We’ll be glad to know you better! Also I’m really glad you’re here despite the hardships you’ve been through. I’m glad you came here and find the strength to share about how you feel. So thank you for posting your message, from the bottom of my heart.
I’d like to ask: what makes you feel your relationship with your parents is ruined? I mean, is communicating with them difficult for the moment, or anything like that? If you don’t want to answer, that’s okay. But I also want you to know that whatever you did in the past doesn’t make you a mistake at all. You’re a human being, just like all of us. We’re all trying to find our way in a wild world… it’s the most difficult job ever! But nothing will change the fact you have worth and value. You are a unique individual in this world and you matter.
Sending much Love your way.
I am so sorry you are not among people who are lifting you up and supporting you. Family can be trying, and in the midst of everything you are going through and feeling, you deserve someone to tell you that you are important. You should be reminded that your life matters. I am so glad you posted, because now we have the opportunity to fulfill the shortcomings of the people around you. Circumstances can cause situations that might effect people’s behavior. You can overcome, hold fast <3
after breaking my back for the 2nd time i felt useless. My friends deployed without me and my career was over. I had just come from being homeless and worked my way up to be struck back down into the bottom. people didnt acknowledge me and looked down on me for my injuries. i wasnted to die and felt i had nohting left to live for. Then i found a group of people who were in the same position as me. i learned that i could put effort into loving them instead of hating myself . it helped.
that was basically my share at my NA meeting today. “I’m 16 months free from pills, yet I’m still just disappointing everyone. I really believe right now people just don’t care. That I could literally just fall off the face of the earth and no one would care” < I spent more than 7 years addicted to pills my parents aren’t really safe people. My FAMILY is Danjo, Casey + people from HS. They are the people who helped me stay clean and they live in a whole different country.
Hey friend, I’m sorry you’re at the point that you’re at right now. I can’t imagine what those experiences have put you through. I want you to know that you’re not a fuck up, your past mistakes don’t get to dictate your future and they CERTAINLY don’t define who you are as a person. And I know exactly the feeling of no one will care if you were to disappear, believe me… I struggle with that CONSTANTLY.
The truth is there are people who care, and if you aren’t able to find that in your day to day life then let this community care for you and help you find that. Hold fast.
Hey, this may sound silly because you have no idea who I am but I promise you that you are not a fuck up. People will miss you, people will notice, if you died it would be more than just a tally count. There are so many people who must care about you. Please look at yourself in a better light because you are worth it! You will get through this