So I haven’t cut myself since 5/9/2021, but last night I was scratching my arm with a piece of broken plastic. I mean I guess I had the intention of cutting, but I knew the plastic wasn’t going to cut through my skin. I’m not sure if this counts as relapse since it left little red scratch marks. I asked my boyfriend if he thinks I relapsed and he said yes, but then again, if I stubbed my toe a little he’d ask if I was okay and probably apologize lol.
From: j71s8 (Discord)
Firstly, thank you for sharing! You’re loved, you matter, and you’re cared for greatly! It can be so tough to break the cycle of self harm. Once you’re out of the cycle of self harm it can be so wonderful to be out of it! At the same time it can be so easy to get back into the cycle of self harm. Self harm can be such a hard thing to describe, but the question is, did you intend it for the same purposes as before? I think you answered it yourself in the topic. “I mean I guess I had the intention of cutting”. I want you to know you are loved, and you are worthy of life and worthy of being free of self harm. So you need to make sure you keep yourself free of self harm. This is such an easy thing to fall back in to. It’s like going back to an old friend. i want to encourage you to talk here if you need to be encouraged next time you have that feeling, we are here and we care for you. You are worthy of life, health, and being free of any harmful markings on your body. You are loved!
From: Night/in/gale (Discord)
Heya there! Proud of you for being 20 days clean! SH is a pain, and it becomes an addictive, almost dependant thing in a way. From my experience, being clean for however much time and then suddenly, almost unconsciously, hurting myself, was horrible because it made me realise that the cycle is hard to get out of. And even once I thought I’d broken free, the temptation was huge and it’s a daily fight to keep going. My mistake was not talking to my therapist about it because I saw it as a little blip that would sort itself out on its own. So in that sense I would say that if you feel you’ve relapsed, talk to your/a therapist about it. Finding little distractions is also good, and, most importantly, not letting yourself get discouraged. You may have a little stumble every now and again, but if you get back up and keep fighting, then that’s what matters most. Wishing you best of luck, and I hope it gets better for ya!
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