After two weeks of not having internet and playing phone tag I finally have internet again and I also have data again haha. Well my therapy appointment had to get moved back since therapist I signed up for wasn’t part of my insurance so now I go the 28th. So far I’ve only had one bad day over the past two weeks. Survivors guilt is really wearing on me. When I’m freaking out I feel like I should complete the task I tried over a month ago. I know when I’m like that I know I can’t move. I lay there paralyzed because if I move it won’t end well. I’m trying to be more open to my friends about my past and current situation. Its hard because being open since I never have been. Writing on here knowing people don’t know me or maybe we do but because I’m not using my actual name you don’t realize it makes it so much easier to write here. I’m just hoping one day talking to others about it will be just as easy.
Hey Icecream,
Just wanted to say how brave it is that you came and talked about the struggles you are facing. Know that there is a new family here at HS who is eager to help you and listen to whatever it is that you desire to tell us.
We love you and hope to keep learning more about you.
If Finding a therapist is a problem because your insurance doesn’t cover them. It might be because the new medicare changes, but either way you should contact your insurance provider and get a list of therapists that are covered. I know for me I lost my individual therapist (allegedly temporarily cause they said they were getting the appropriate certifications), but I also signed up for group therapy and that therapist was certified. So tbh, I don’t need a therapist. I just need to trust people more.)
Hey Icecream,
How are you? It was really brave of you to post on here and you should be proud of that.
I hope everything is better, if not just hang on in there! I know you’re strong enough to overcome your battles.
Hold fast friend,
Luna 
️