i feel so isolated. all I do is sit at home and watch anime or play sims on my computer. i’ve tried to meet new people romantically and for friends but it never works out and always defeats me and it’s getting even harder with covid now. I have friends but they are also struggling with depression and illness. one of my best friends needs a liver transplant and has been going through a lot and even though she tells me she’s there for me, it’s hard for me to come to her because i’m always that person for her and when i have she unintentionally will stop listening or change the topic back to herself because to be quite frank that’s just how she is. i really don’t think she notices it. My other best friend sympathizes with me but I really don’t like dumping shit on her either. i wish my mom was around 
we used to be best friends but her mental health deteriorated a lot. the last time we spoke she told me I wasn’t depressed and that made me sad, because she knows I am. I’ve told her I wanted to kill myself before. sometimes i swear a hug could cure me. I haven’t felt the comfort of someone in so long. I wish someone could just hold me and let me cry. and tell me everything will be okay. being strong for yourself becomes draining, especially when you have been doing it since you were a child. 
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With you @butterflygirl1
It can be hard to find a good support system. So far everyone here has been really helpful and supportive. Take it one day at a time 
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Your’e an honorable person putting others before self.
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Hi butterflygirl1,
The HeartSupport Houston team responded to your topic. Click here to watch it.
Hold Fast friend, and lean on our community.
- John and the HeartSupport Houston team
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