From sammmy2000: It’s just hit me that I’m not 14 anymore and I have grown and I changed… it’s kinda freaky when you realise how much you changed that you don’t even understand who you are anymore but still here i am stuck with this emotional, this anger this pain from leaving the past and seeing how it’s always the same problem… I’m 23 years old left with emotional from 10 years ago… it’s like I’m drowning in a wave then swimming up again
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I’m a lot older than you, and I can still think about things that happened in the past and get upset with myself all over again. There is a level of mind that experiences memories, imaginings, even stories of books or movies, as though they are happening in the present. That’s why movies can make your heart race. It can even happen with books.
Therefore, if you reawaken 10-year-old pain, it will still be pain. The pain can diminish gradually as when you think about it, you remind yourself that it really is in the past and you need not experience it again. There are some memories, for example having been molested in childhood that I can think about briefly and it won’t affect my mood, but if I spend time with the memory, the feelings start becoming more intense.
This reminds me about a common misconception about forgiveness. If you have tried forgiving someone but can still be upset when thinking about the offense, it doesn’t mean that you can’t forgive that person. Forgiveness is a decision, not an emotion or an emotional reaction.
From Luvforjada: I understand that coming to the realization of how much you have grown and changed can be overwhelming and even unsettling. It’s natural to experience a sense of confusion or loss of identity during this phase of self-discovery. Remember that personal growth is a continuous journey, and it’s normal to evolve and redefine yourself over time.
Acknowledging the emotions, anger, and pain that stem from leaving the past behind can be a significant step toward healing. It takes courage to confront these emotions and address the persistent problems that seem to resurface. Just like swimming against a wave, it can feel exhausting at times, but you’ve demonstrated resilience by persisting and resurfacing.
You have already shown strength in recognizing the need for change and growth. It may be beneficial to seek support from a professional, such as a psychologist, who can provide guidance and assist you in navigating these complex emotions. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and there are resources available to help you along the way.
Keep in mind that personal growth takes time and patience. Allow yourself the space to explore and understand who you are becoming. Embrace the opportunity to discover new aspects of yourself and build a brighter future. With determination and self-compassion, you can overcome challenges and find a sense of fulfillment and purpose.
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From Rohini_868: It can be shocking when we see the changes in ourselves. Is there a version of you you’d like to work towards? It can be the simplest thing, would it help to write down what you’d like to be in a year, or in five years? And then you can see what you might need t od oto get there. Forexample if you wanted to run a marathon, then the first thing would be to get some walking shoes and start walking for five minutes a day to build stamna and endurance, and the mental outlook for it.
Is there anything like this you can see for yourself?