It’s killing me

Today I woke up feeling so depressed it hurts for me to try and smile even a little bit. Been feeling like I haven’t accomplished anything lately and it’s really tearing me apart. I feel like my life is slipping away and I can’t get anything done, because my dad acts like he can control everything I do everyday. I’m starting to feel used and been taken advantage of it’s making wanna hate life all together. Sometimes I feel like dying because the way he treats me and makes me do his chores around the house as he watches tv all day long. I’m starting to lose hope in ever being happy and getting my career started. Some one please help me I feel like I wanna disappear forever, I can’t stand my life anymore it’s hurting me too much.

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Hi ricky I’m so sorry I pressed the wrong thing and made your post a private message! I really do apologise for that.
The reason I was having a look at it was because the format in which it posted wasn’t showing up correctly.
The post is still saved in this message however so you wouldn’t need to rewrite the entire thing if you repost it.
Again, I am so very sorry!

It sounds like your dad is overbearing, and expects more from you than he is willing to do for himself. Some parents become convinced that their children owe them chores and obedience, etc. Within reason, that is true, but a parents role is to promote independence, but it sounds like you are being “micromanaged,” meaning that he is not allowing you much opportunity to make your own decisions.

One thing that might make your situation survivable is the knowledge that you will soon become independent, or at least more independent. In the meantime, are there activities, even extracurricular stuff at school that will allow you to be away from home for a bit longer during your day?

I think you feel like dying because you are becoming inpatient. It would be hard not to be inpatient considering your circumstances. Yet patience can be cultivated. At the beginning of a school year the mind adjusts to the fact that the school year isn’t just about to be over. It’s easier to not think about but term ending, knowing that it’s months away. The mind becomes much calmer and accepting, which makes the time spent in school at least somewhat easier.

It seems that you are dwelling on escape rather than asking yourself what in this moment you can do, or perceive your situation in a way that makes it easier to tolerate. This concept I’m explaining is something that a great many people never figure out, but if you get it, your life will improve.

It may also help to look for distractions, like hobbies, reading or taking walks.

Visualize yourself as an independent adult. That is your future. What are things you can do to be ready for it?

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From: Mamadien

RickyP, I’m so sorry that your dad is still putting so much on you at home. That has to be overwhelming to be expected to do so much around the house. How frustrating to feel taken for granted that way. To do your fair share is fine, but to do more than that isn’t fine. Are you able to get out with friends or to walk or get away on your own at all to clear your head? How are you doing in finding a job that pays enough for you to care for yourself and to live independently? is that possible? It can be really hard to take those first steps and to stand up for yourself. And only you will know when you are ready to do that. What I know is that you are more than a housekeeper and a daughter. You are an adult who deserves to step out into the career they want, and to become the person you are meant to be. You matter my friend.

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From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hey friend, its really nice to hear from you, I am just sorry its under these circumstances. Ricky, you have done your bit for your dad now, he had surgery and you have taken car e of him but as long as you keep your mess tidy and clean and taken care of because that is what we do when we live in a place, we look after it , other than that now its time for you to live your life, you have years ahead of you, you have choices to make that career you want to start, things to do and no one has the right to hold you back. I encourage you to sit and talk to your Dad and let him know that if he cant take care of himself when you are out getting your life together then he will need to get someone in to help him or manage until you get home at the end of the day. its been a while now since surgery and sitting in front of the tv is not an option and not fair for you. No one wants you to disappear, we all want to see you succeed, I want to see you flourish so much. Please try. Much Love Lisa. x

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