So today after having dinner my mom asked me if I was okay, firstly I didn’t respond then I told her that I was suffering from DPDR. they were confused a bit what I told them what actually I am going through but I know it feels good to see their unconditional support that’s what all matters for me now. I don’t know what my future will be holding for me but at least they are now aware that I am not alright. There is so much inside me that I want to tell them or anyone else but I don’t have the right words to make them understand. I am just living in dream sometimes I feel like I am floating in air, I feel weightless and at times I question myself who I am what I am doing, what is this all. I know this sound crazy but that’s is what I feel and also feel like that memory isn’t sharp now . Hopefully this all end soon and I will be back to normalcy soon
I am so pleased that you have been able to confide in your family, it will make such a huge difference to you to have the support of loved ones.
You were very brave to take that moment to speak up and now that you have you know that you can go to them at any time and they will hear you. I don’t know much about DPDR but I do know that having your family by your side is a wonderful bonus.
I hope in time with the support you have, things will settle down for you, keep opening up when you feel you need to.
Lisaw thanks for your wonderful words , means a lot to me.
That was very brave of you to open up and share how you’re really doing with your family. I’m glad they are supportive and also that everyone seems aware that this is new territory for all of you, and there will be a period of learning. Thanks for opening up to us as well, here to support you and remind you that you’re worthy and loved here too! Wishing you well, with happy moments and days ahead!
Yeah my family is very supportive and I know things aren’t really good rn I had to share my problems with them. Things that are going rn are very bad and make me realise how ungrateful I have been all my life. I want enjoy the same old life like it used to be, I want to feel things, I want to feel myself again. Thanks for your lovely words.
Thank you so much for reaching out. I hope you can find some comfort by being here and sharing your heart.
You don’t sound crazy at all. Really. Dpdr can be incredibly difficult 1/ to explain and describe, to find the right words; 2/ to be understood by someone who hasn’t experienced that. Please know that what you said makes sense. Whenever I struggled with this, the word “floating” came to my mind too. Like being in a dream, and everything around you, including yourself, becomes weird. It happened that I looked at myself in the mirror and felt like it was the first time I was seeing my own face, like I was looking at a stranger while knowing rationally that it was me of course. I have vivid memories of struggling with this at a young age already, certainly because I grew up in a violent/unhealthy environment. I would sometimes start to see the person talking to me and the conversation happening as if I was outside of myself. It is quite scary and stressful at first, especially seems it feels like we have no way to make things normal again intentionally.
As you said though: it will get back to normal. DPDR is away that your brain has to protect you. It may seem inappropriate or happening at times you didn’t expect, in a context that doesn’t make sense. But it’s still a normal reaction to some of us. You are not crazy, weird or stuck with this. It was VERY brave of you to talk about it with your family. That is something to be proud of.
It may feel a bit useless at first, but I’d encourage you to try to cultivate activities that would help you connect a little more to your physical senses. You may feel still very numb, but your body also has a physical memories of scents, textures, movements, etc. Focusing on it can help you reconnect a little bit to your body and ground yourself a little more. Try to feel the water on your hands while you wash them. Take a few minutes to close your eyes and identify all the sounds around you. Listen to a music you like and try to perceive all the instruments in it. Take your time while you eat and focus on the sensations, all the subtle flavors in it. These little things can help you feel a little more connected to the world around you and to yourself, even if it seems a bit mechanic at first.
Know that you are not alone in this. It’s been a litlle while that it hasn’t happened to me, but I know how scary it can be. Slowly but surely, you will feel again, without being in this floating movement that seems impossible to grasp. Remind yourself that you are entirely part of this world. Because you are.
so warm words from your side and it is always a positive to hear from the people who have been through such things. Hopefully things will get back better and nothing will be same again . This craziness will be over and I will start a normal life. Thanks a lot