Hi everybody.
I think the last update I gave was about how I was stressing over all the things and not being able to sleep. That was subsided greatly since I posted. I think its helping that my husband is kind of wanting to now get all the stuff we don’t have yet and it’s more of a tag team thing where we’re both more on the same page - I don’t think either of us are that stressed but we both are ready to get all the last minute stuff taken care of and it’s nice.
My OB recently doubled my heartburn meds as I was having the most horrible heartburn imaginable for a few weeks. It helped a lot for about a week and then I started getting pretty nauseous again. I think part of it might be the morning sickness which never really totally went away for me, but I ended up taking a half dose of my heartburn meds this morning which made the nausea more tolerable.
Which is a great Segway into my current anxieties.
I recently had the standard 1 hour gestational diabetes test which I failed (apparently it’s really easy to fail the 1 hour test, especially if, like me, you don’t fast because the doc said you didn’t have to). This means, on Monday, I have to take the dread 3 hour glucose test. Basically, I have to fast from my last meal on Sunday until (assuming I don’t throw up on Monday) about noon Monday.
With my history of ulcers I can’t lay down within 2 hours of eating (which I’ve pushed to at least 2.5 hours since digestion is slower during pregnancy) otherwise I get agonizing stomach pain, so I will be fasting for approximately 16 hours before I take the test the next morning. The test takes 4 hours generally - I get my blood drawn to see what my fasting blood sugar levels are, and then I have to drink a super sugary drink in 5 mins (which is also super hard with my ulcers and I’ll be surprised if I can even do this part). After the drink, I need to get my blood drawn every hour on the hour, 3 times. By the time it’s all said and done, I will have gone around 20 hours without eating… usually I have pretty aggressive nausea in the morning until I eat so I’ve pretty much convinced myself that I am probably going to fail. Not because of my sugar levels, but because I don’t think I’ll make it that long fasting without throwing up, which is an automatic fail.
My doctors said I can take dramamine before I take the test which I think will be my only salvation, assuming it works. I’m trying to decide if I should wake myself up before midnight and eat a snack so that I can cut a handful of hours off the amount of time I’ll be fasting, it will just be a trade off for a lot less sleep, which also contributes to nausea so I don’t know which would be worse. Just a lot of uncertainty and dread on that front.
I guess in the plus side I don’t have pre-eclampsia which the doctors have been worried about because I have chronic hypertension.
As for the progress part of this, aside from no longer being so worried about being prepared, I have had a couple of shifts in how my mind is, I guess changing.
I’ve noticed that:
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I’m so ready to not be pregnant anymore. I miss not having my organs squished and not being short of breath because of it. I want to lose weight so my back will stop hurting. And its kind of hard to sleep when someone is doing gymnastics in your belly.
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I was doing some reading about the first weeks after the baby is born and some milestones and it was so cute. I feel like its a step towards maybe not being so apprehensive about how scary it will be to be a mom, but at the same time I know myself and I fully expect an anxious breakdown in the early days.
Anyways, that’s what’s been going on in my brain lately. Thanks for reading.