Just sad @kitboga

It’s been a long couple of years with a lot of ups and downs. With many deaths in my family some being truly tragic misgivings. I thought things were getting better and my husband got a promotion. Then over Thanksgiving my nephew tried to take his own life and I felt hopefully and helpless. Thankfully he survived and is okay now but man I can’t get over the fact that he might not have been in my life. I just wanted to tell you that you make my life a little brighter. Thank you for everything you do. You are an answer person.

Thanks again
Rachel

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@Metrabolic hi friend and thank you for posting, welcome to HeartSupport. I know Kit will do his best to respond to you as soon as he can, in the meantime I am so sorry that you have had such a dreadful couple of years, to have any death to cope with is hard enough but many and perhaps not under circustances one would expect, I cant even imagine how hard that has been, its not fair for anyone to have to live with that.
Thanksgiving must have been so frightening and consistent of every emotion you possess, I cannot imagine how having someone you love want their life to end to that extent and I am truly so happy for you and your family that he survived and hopfully is getting some help with how he is feeling, I think something like that is bound to stay with you for a while, its a real trauma for everyone, this is not an off the cuff situation, I would say its perfectly normal to struggle with that, have you thought about perhaps talking to someone about all these things? when you look at everything - that is a lot and even the strongest personality struggles sometimes. I am so pleased that having Kit in your life has made it brighter and that you get the chance to tell him that.
Rachel, I hope that moving forward life does improve, that the light that Kit brings starts to shine brighter all the time and that your Nephew also gets well and finds meaning in his life too. You and he are both loved and valueable.
Much Love
Lisa :heart:

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Hey @Metrabolic,

Thank you so much for sharing what’s on your heart here. I am so grateful for Kit and his community to provide time and healing to each of us who might need it, especially during the holidays.

I am so very sorry for your loss, and for what happened to your nephew as well. Thankfully he is still here and I am so grateful for that. Although it must have been a real shock for you to know about what happened. When someone we love tried to take their own life, we can easily fall in the trap of guilting ourselves and believing that we should have done this or done that. Truth is it’s not anyone’s fault, and rewriting the story can only hurt. What we can cultivate though is more communication, more vulnerability, ando end their life. I thought just like you, so many times, how my life would have been without them. I felt abandoned, angry, heartbroken, helpless. There’s a real grief process at play when we realize what was avoided, and a lot of gratitude to embrace for what is now.

I have no doubt that your nephew loves you very much, and knows as well how much you love him. Your post here speaks for itself and shows how caring you are to the people around you. I hope you allow yourself to take time for yourself, to mourn at your own pace and to reinforce the beauty that keeps being present in your life.

You are loved. :hrtlegolove:

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