Ok, thank you for letting me know.
I wish I could take that pain away for you immediately. Just having a magic wand and making it all more peaceful. More simple.
You are very brave, @blini, do you know that? I know you didn’t ask for it… being in this battle. Feeling like you can’t even sit without feeling restless. Feeling like “rest” is a very, very foreign word. You didn’t ask for all of this shit. I wish there was a way to erase everything and start from a blank page. For you, for me, for so many around here.
I know so little about you and your story, although what I do know and never cease to see, is that you have all that it takes to find your peace again through this mess of pain. Without hurting yourself. It’s like a giant know to untangle. It’s overwhelming, suffocating. And that’s why during those times it’s important to reduce it as the simplest and smallest step possible.
For now, I’d like to invite you to literally shake it out. This pain that you feel in your body, move it out. Get up on your feet, put some powerful music and dance, jump. Shake your arms, your hands, your legs, your shoulders. embrace this body that is yours entirely. It doesn’t belong to the pain. It is not stuck to it. You can prove it to yourself, right now.
Another two very quick actions to take that personally helped me a lot when I am in pain, are the following ones: Treating Trauma: 2 Ways to Help Clients Feel Safe, with Peter Levine - YouTube - I would encourage you to try it out. <3
I know, “another exercise…”, right? Although right now, you are in pain, and there is nothing to lose for trying. Your mind is an amazing tool to learn to navigate this pain. Your body is also your ally. Your imagination and capacity of visualization can be very powerful. I want to encourage you to try to use it today, now, as your soul needs it.
This pain that you feel is very present, but it’s not going to control you. You are safe where you are right now. You are safe with yourself, even if it feels differently.
If I could, I would convey that a little more by sitting with you, with the pain too. Please know it’s still happening, even if it’s only “virtual”. You are not alone. This pain is not going to take the best of you. Nor you, nor your heart or your life. You are so very much more stronger. You will be okay.