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Killing myself goodbye (TW)


#1

Im doing it, im just a fuck up who ruins friendships and cause chaos, I made my friend really upset and angry to the point i got banned from the HS server over my actions and I am so sorry. I dont deserve to be helped or saved because i fuck everything up and I ruin everything.

Im really sorry everyone. Especially to you Josy im really really sorry for being the worst friend.

Im killing myself, the world is better off without me because all i do is fuck up everything

I love all of you.


#2

Please talk to somebody, anybody! Your life is worth living and somebody out there cares about you. Please don’t give up! Feel free to talk to me at anytime.


#3

You’re not a fuck up. I know that things seem really bad right now, I’ve been there, I can relate. Like @jmatt0659 said, your life is worth living. We all need you to stay strong. A favorite adage of mine is “This too shall pass” I learned to live through any difficult moment with those four words. Every storm has its end. And things will seem yup get worse, but please don’t be disheartened, the darkest hour is the one that comes just before the dawn. I’m here for you if you need someone to talk to. Stay strong, we love you.


#4

Nobody gives a fuck anyways plus i cant talk to anyone IM BANNED FROM THE HS DISCORD IM ENDING IT TONIGHT.


#5

HS DOESNT LOVE ME THEY BANNED ME FROM THE DISCORD AND I CANT BE HELPED. I REFUSE TO BE HELPED ANY LONGER im done.


#6

Juan please!
Don’t do it. You deserve all the help. I’m sorry I hurt you, I really am. But that isn’t a reason to end it all. It doesn’t mean I love you less. It was all for my own safety.

The only thing I can do is ask you not to do it and seek the help you need.
I’m so sorry.

Josy.


#7

You already blocked me on every fucking thing you even said you dont want to be my friend! You dont even love me. Im not getting help im ending it all like i promised.


#8

Look you blocked me on all social media you clearly dont want the friendship you said it yourself!


#9

I need you to stay strong. Suicide doesn’t end your suffering, it ends you. There are so many great things that you can do with your life that you can’t do if you’re not here tomorrow. Please please please please please don’t do it. The three of us can walk out of this together, but I need you to take a breath.


#10

Raven.

I get it stuff is hard. Don’t take it out on those who have tried to help you such as Josy.

People try to help but man it gets hard.

Everyone has their own struggles too and I get it you find reaching out to people in your vaccinity hard and it feels like it doesn’t work but man it takes time.

I am not trying to be a b*tch when I say these things.

It seems as though you find some people and you go in the same cycle; some of us can’t help is the simplest way to put it.

I had to let you go and send you to someone who could better help. I have tried and tried to get you to seek aid where you are.

I will NOT tolerate you attacking those who have tried to help you but have had to let you go for their own reasons. I understand you are mad but just because people have had to take a break from helping you doesn’t mean they don’t love you.

Once again, not trying to sound like a jerk.

You are the one who needs to seek help. You are the one who needs to reach out to resources where you are.

Hold fast.


#11

Man.

Sometimes people need a break. It’s hard.

We all have our own struggles. Josy, I, and a lot of others have had to take a break because we ourselves are struggling.

Dude. That doesn’t mean you aren’t loved. Love is shown.

I will not tolerate ANYONE attacking those that have tried to help them and have shown them love.

By stating “I’m going to kill myself like I promised” man that is not a fair game. You’re making the people who love you and are trying to help feel trapped. They have their own struggles and it’s like you have handcuffed yourself to them by saying those words.

Not trying to be mean. I’ve just been where Josy is. It’s really freaking hard.

Hold fast.


#12

@RaveN - I don’t know what happened on Discord, and I understand how being banned from something can be frustrating, but it’s not something to end your life over. Learn from your mistakes and pick yourself back up, and I’m sure you’ll be let back into Discord after some time. (I’m not an admin so take what I say with a grain of salt). Life is about making mistakes and learning from them. :slight_smile:


#13

Killing yourself because you’re a fuckup is really fucked up. Threatening to kill yourself because you promised is also really fucked up.

If you know that you messed up, why would you not try to fix it? I don’t understand. The only loss so far is communication. You can make new friends. You can learn from your mistakes and move on.

You won’t move on if you “end it all”. What do you think you’ll accomplish by taking your life? Ending your misery? What proof is there that when you end your life that your misery ends? Is it because you hurt others? How are you going to stop hurting others if you end it all. Is it really because you fuck it up? How is ending your life going to fix what you fucked up?

Have you really thought this through? (You should talk to your parents about this because your maturity is obvious and you need a perspective from someone that has matured.)


#14

Hi there friend. First and foremost you are not a screw up. I know how it feels to feel like a person who does nothing but screw up everything. But mistakes don’t define us. You are NOT the sum of your mistakes but the sum of Gods love for you.
Killing yourself will not make things better. It just won’t. You learning and growing from your mistakes is what will make things better. Mistakes are a part of life. But we grow from them. It’s not always easy but I believe that with God all things are possible.
Friend, there is a Divine purpose for your life. Don’t leave. There would be a whole in the universe if you weren’t here. Trust me when i say killing yourself WONT make things better. Stay. We want you to. Hold fast and remember MISTAKES DON’T DEFINE YOU. You are loved. Don’t give into the thought that killing yourself is ok and will make things better. IT WONT.


#15

Once you hit the bottom, you can only go up. If this is your breaking point, just know that sometimes you have to get broken to get better. It’s time for you to get better. We care about you here and sometimes feelings can get overwhelming and you may think no one cares, but so so so many people care.


#16

Please don’t I don’t know you personal but I know I would be upset your HS family even know ur not in the discord ur still family


#17

Please think about who would miss you


#18

I have quote for you I got this while I was at the crisi unit

"even now as broken as you may feel you still strong

there something to be said for how you hold yourself together and keep moving even though you feel like shattering DONT STOP this is healing it doesn’t have be pretty or graceful

YOU just have KEEP GOING

-MAXWELL dawuch