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Learning not to feel guilty for eating sweets(TW)

I’m having some cake right now for the first time in a long while and somehow I feel a little off, like a bit of guilt. Like when I had soda again yesterday for my brother’s birthday, after a while of not having it. I know that having dessert and sodas once in a while isn’t bad but there’s still that very small voice that doesn’t trust me being around sugary stuff because I used to suffer from food binges a lot and I had no control. So I kinda have to like have to do some self soothing and encouragement. I didn’t grow up with a lot of self trust. For a long a time I let my mother do things for me because she made me feel like I couldn’t do anything right when I made mistakes as a child. I would get punished harshly.

Also you know writing this all down helps me realize where these thoughts and ideas come. Makes me realize that those little things in childhood that I think didn’t mean much, actually had a huge impact in the way I think and do things now. Small minds are more sensitive than you think. And now I’m rambling on again lol

But I think that lack of trust has actually prevented me from doing a lot of things. I think trusting myself is the thing I’m missing the most. The cake is really good by the way. Red velvet

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yayyyy what a happy post! Cake AND insight!!

Loving the growth i’m seeing here! Glad you’re able to enjoy that cake!
I’m smiling a lot after this post!

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That’s really amazing @Amaris. Your fear based on past experiences with binges is understandable. However food is necessary (and everywhere), so healing goes along with learning to live with every type of food again. To make with it, little by little. Acknowledging this kind of experience is so positive and speaks so much for your own growth.

Enjoy. Both the cake, and these sparks of life during which you are learning to trust yourself again. You deserve it so much. :hrtlegolove:

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