I have destructive coping mechanisms and have my entire adult life. I repeatedly hurt the person who loves me the most. 2 Years into therapy and meds, but still failing.
I often think of it like trying to turn an oil tanker. At first it is impossible.
Small steps, small changes result in new directions.
Trust it will get better, you will have done some strong work in the last two years, no small feat.
I wish you continued success and strength.
Bug hugs x
You’re not failing, actively working on yourself is taking steps to succeed and I’m so proud of you, if you feel like something isn’t working, maybe it’s time to shop around for another therapist that may be a better fit for you. Never give up, you’re doing great
thank you for sharing. I understand this on such a personal level. I spent 12 years self-harming multiple times a day, and I went through so many different therapists. I’ve been on meds for more than 5 years, I’ve finally been through a round of sessions with a therapist that did really help. However, even though the medication helps and that therapy helped, I feel Im slipping back to where i was. Constantly thinking about suicide and hiding blades around my flat urging to harm.
We love you and thank you for sharing. Just know that you’re not failing even though you feel like you are. You’ve addressed it and have actively been seeking help for yourself to get better. Take it one day at a time, you will get there no matter how long it takes. You are better than you were the day before because you’re not the same person as yesterday or even a month ago.
Hey Friend. I understand this personally. In my depessive lowest I would sleep for days on end, no eatting or drinking. I ended up passing out at random points and had to go to a hospital. I was told if I didn’t fix it I would die. I still stuggle with not sleeping too long 8 years after. I’m at a point where I feel like I am finally in control. I know you can get past your issues with time, please give yourself grace and allow yourself to be honest with your doctors and partner.
You’re aware your coping mechanisms are destructive is an important strength! You’re on the path to progress, and what you call “failures” are hard times to go through, but which make you stand out each time stronger to keep moving forward. Habits are really hard to change, it takes a lot of patience.Even if you don’t perceive it like that for now, you will continue to get to know yourself and gradually make the choices that suit you. It’s a day-to-day path and you’ll get there friend.
I’ve heard an analogy with making ruts in a bar of soap which represents thought patterns in your brain. You can make a pretty deep rut going through the same coping mechanisms. When you realize this, you can make corrections to start a new rut in the soap. Sometimes you’ll still get stuck in your old rut because it’s so deep, but it is still possible to recognize and get out.
You are continuously learning. As a kid you soak everything up as a sponge, as an adult you can still learn, grow and change but you can only change if you WANT to change. While it may take longer to learn, it isn’t impossible. Doesn’t matter what age you are, you can still learn and grow. That’s being human.
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Also we talked about your topic on my art stream today check it out here: