Life is stagnant

For the first time in my life I’m finally able to hold down a full time job, fully support myself, and I’m living on my own while attending online school. I work from home as well. But, with school and work I am so mentally drained that I have no energy to see my friends or go anywhere. I’ve been feeling like life is pointless. Not in a way that I want it to end and I feel no purpose but, almost like I’m just here. I’m just working and doing school and binging Netflix with my animals. I wish I had a partner to lean on and experience life with but, I don’t. I know I don’t need to a significant other to be happy but, man it would be nice. I’m just feeling lonely and stuck.


I think it’s a natural desire to want to share life with someone to love and to love you back. Friends and family can certainly fill some voids, but it is a different type of relationship when you have a partner.
It’s okay to feel lonely, even natural. And I’m glad you know that you don’t NEED someone significant, but like you said, it is nice.
I know it sounds silly, but something I’ve been doing lately is basically “dating myself”. It’s actually been so nice. Like my favourite thing is going to a cafe in the early morning with a book and having breakfast.
Another great thing to do is to make a list of your accomplishments and achievements. You did that all for you! And one day there will be someone to celebrate with, but always remember how capable you are!


From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hey Friend, thank you for your post, isn’t strange how we strive to accomplish the things we think are so important in life and then when we finally crack it we notice that the most important thing (ourselves) has been completely forgotten about? I hope you are super proud of all of your other accomplishments; I think what you are doing is just wonderful so well done. Do you have any interests? Is there anything that you have ever thought, id love to give that a try? Painting for example? Baking? Reading? Anything that you could join a club for outside of your home? Are there any groups online that you could join where you could get to know locals and meet up for a brunch in public so its safe but get to know new people? I know it can be a scary but as long as you can meet in public places and in groups im sure it would be fine and fun too. Another good way to meet people is dog walking, if you don’t have a dog you could ask an elderly neighbour with one if you could walk theirs once or twice a week, lots of people come and say hi when you walk a dog. You have done so well for yourself that I have no concerns that if you put your mind to it that you can do anything you want and do it well. I wish you so much luck and look forward to hearing all about how you are getting on. Much Love Lisa. x

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Hi @shortcats I’m sorry you’re feeling lonely and stuck. Have you tried doing something completely different? Maybe visit an animal shelter and volunteer to pet them and give them love? There are other’s there doing the same thing that you could be around. It’s something I’ve been thinking about doing because I have the same problem. I hope you find something that gives you fulfillment. ~Mystrose


From: eloquentpetrichor

Hello there, shortcats! It sounds like life is going well at least even if you feel a bit lonely. Have you tried finding an online community to find some people to interact with? Or picking up a hobby outside of your apartment so that you can find some people to interact with. Find some friends and maybe you will connect with someone and find a SO that way. Or find someplace to volunteer. You can give back to your community and interact with some others. Volunteer at an animal shelter maybe.

I’m so glad you don’t feel the need for a SO but it is natural for people who feel attraction to others to want that kind of connection. And I find that you aren’t really ready to let someone else into your life until you are satisfied with your own company. It sounds like you are, so I hope you find someone to share some of your time with.

Good luck finding friends and company. I know it is difficult in today’s world but it can be done. Please update us soon especially if you find a hobby and some friends to help you feel less stuck
:hrtlegolove: :hrtlegolove:


From: SuchBlue

Hi shortcats, thanks for posting :slightly_smiling_face:
Especially with covid and just life getting busier and busier, it keeps getting harder to socialise with people and I can definitely relate to that. I’d say maybe try to find some people with common interests online or try to make friends with the people in your online school. Life is sometimes monotonous with school, and I’m practically on the same position as you. You can get through this :hrtlegolove:


Hi shortcats
Welcome back to heartsupport. It seems like you have had a bit of a existential crisis. I think you should try to change things up a bit in your life. try to find your way. Maybe you can try to find an animal sherter job or find some kind of a new hobby. You can met new people exactly when you go into new places. think this is the best peace of advice I have got. I hope it was helpful at least a bit. :wink:


From: micronious

I really hope you feel great instead of stuck… feeling stuck is no fun… I wish you happiness my friend … and the kind that warms your soul from within. make life exactly what you want it to be … I’m so very proud of you and what you have accomplished so far… Life always moves forward so don’t worry … that stagnant feeling will stop! much love and light on your journey my friend !!


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