I have tried to make friends with people but no one lasts or cares to be there for me in the long run. I am in need of social support but others don’t seem to get it or don’t care.
I am on a couple Facebook groups for making friends. I’ve reached out to people on their posts multiple times. Some just ignore me, maybe because they have a lot of other comments before mine, and others add me but never talk. Idk why they make posts but never try to follow through. It hurts even more to be let down repeatedly like this than to just not even try.
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Hey friend,
I’m sorry that you’re going through this. Being lonely is a painful experience and can completely crush one’s soul. There was a peirod of my life, a year or so - maybe more, where I was completely isolated. My only human interaction was when I would have virtual meetings with coworkers or play online with old buddies. On top of this, I moved to another state and genuinely didn’t know anyone, worsening the isolation.
This is what I did and am still doing…
I thought about what exactly I wanted out of having friends/relationships with people. I really just wanted companionship, people to hang out with, go on adventures with, etc.
So I started just going to bars, networking events, shows, public events, etc. and just hung out. I let my ego aside (fear of being judged by others) and allowed myself to just be me. Struck up conversations with people and remained curious. Asked questions, got to know them.
Then I’d start showing up FOR THEM. you get what you give. what you put out comes back to you. While I was the one who was lonely and in dire need of companionship, I gave my time and energy to the other person. It takes time to develope any sort of meaningful relationship with people. Even more so when you genuinely need people there for you. But you have to do the opposite of what you want in order to fill your needs. when you are there for others and support them through things…they’ll return that favor. It’s just human nature.
It takes time, but it’s so worth it. I’ve been where I moved to for a year and now have one of the best social networks I’ve ever had in my life. It’s only because I decided to step out of my comfort zone, moved my ‘selfish’ needs aside, and became of service and support for others.
I hope this gives some perspective and helps you generate ideas that works for your life, abilities, and needs.
Stay in there, friend! You, in fact, are not alone!
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Hi there @Bobohobo 
It can be disappointing and disheartening when someone doesn’t match your efforts when making friends. The social support you long for is totally valid. You deserve to have meaningful people and connections in your life.
The online world is unpredictable and can change in the blink of an eye. Not every response will show your worth or reflect it. Making friends takes time, but not everyone you meet will want to make friends with you, and that’s okay.
Have you considered other ways to meet people both online and offline? It might be a good idea to join a club or group based on the things you like and enjoy. This is a great way to connect with people who are similar to you. This way, you are more likely to get a response.
Please keep your head up. Brighter days will come 