Loosing the Will to live

So i’m losing the will to live . I don’t want to die but i’m struggling. I am not sure if i want to relapse . I think about it but i know i wont . so i’m not worried about that. I’m so dang tired of feeling like i’m the only one or that everyone’s against me/doesn’t believe in what I say . I just don’t know what to do anymore . Whenever I mention this topic to my dad he goes “he will be fine” or " i believe he isn’t sick" and this is the second time I’ve heard it and it mentally wrecks me because what I had said means the world to me and my dads like pushing it away from me . I’M just done i’m just furious with what i have to deal with. I just don’t know if i have the will anymore :confused: . i’m sorry guys. but i’ll try to keep fighting.

I am sorry you are struggling so much. That you don’t feel heard and listened. It sounds really hard but I can see how hard you are fighting and see you are pushing through. Hope you will keep reaching out on here. You are cared about and can get through this. Take it one moment at a time. Your feelings are valid and you have every right to feel angry and upset. I’m sorry you are hurting. Please know that it’s okay to not feel okay. To feel these emotions and it’s possible to get through this emotions come and go like waves but they do pass even if it takes time. Things can and do get better. Thank you for reaching out. You aren’t alone.

what sucks is i feel like i want to relapse still and im tempted but i know i need to keep fightign this urge

Being emotionally abandoned by our parents is a very painful thing. Your dad probably has his own struggles that are the reason he is failing to support you in this but it still hurts and I’m sorry you’re going through it.
The good news is that you are not your feelings, and you are not your dad’s words. These are things that you experience; they are not pleasant, but they don’t makeup who you are. You are one of a kind, you have a life that matters to the world; now, and for the future. And, most importantly, you are loved.

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hi friend.
I love you so much. you’re such a kind soul and we all appreciate you so much. I’m sorry you’re going through this, but I know you’re a strong person. I know for a fact that this will pass for you and soon, this won’t be as big of a battle. please stay strong friend. we believe in you and we are here for you: )
stay strong