Missing someone

I have been in contact with a guy over social media for more than 3 years. He is extremely nice and funny and gentle. I grew to adore him.

We recently met up when I vacationed in his city and slept together twice. Last night when I was out with him I felt very bitter sweet about it. The thing is I am moving abroad in a few months and want to pursue a relationship with him. I cannot sense exactly what he wants from me. Given my previous relationship I have an anxious attachment style and I already miss him. What should I do?

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Hi monty,
thank you for sharing and coming back to us.
it is nice to hear, that you have found someone, and yes it sounds bitter sweet so far.
with your anxiety coming up, for living far away again, would it be something for you, to talk honestly about him
for that ? to open up about how you feel, and what you expect or want from this ?
honesty is always, for myself the most important value, when it comes to relationships. to friends, to family, to our
loved people. when we grow older, we more and more appreciate honesty and truth, even if it hurts.
because then, you can move on earlier and you know where you at.
yes it hurts. but love always hurts. love is the strongest feeling, the strongest force we know, that we will ever know.
the heart makes things for us more difficult then the mind. our heart bears no logic.
even if we know this might hurt us, we still love, we still want, we still live for someone.
i hope that you will find what you are searching for in this, from the bottom of my heart, you deserve only the best.
you are loved so much, and you matter most :purple_heart: :face_in_clouds:
feel hugged my friend

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I think that it is important to share as much of your feelings as you are comfortable with the individual. Ask more specifically about what he sees between the two of you, and what he is looking for out of the relationship. I have always found it important to go with my gut, when it comes to relationships. It seems to always know if things are astray, or on track. haha. Not sure what that means, but if your gut is telling you anything. I say listen! :yum:

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Hi Friend,

That’s a tough situation. Feelings can sometimes cloud our minds when it comes to matters of the heart. What I can recommend to you is to be honest with this person about how you feel. Communication is really important when it comes to any friendship or relationship. This is even more important in a potential long-distance situation. I hope that you’re able to have this conversation and gain some clarity. I wish you all the best!

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From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend, nice to meet you, that is quite a situation to be in at the very start of a relationship isnt it? I do not have a lot of advice for you beyond two things, one is that you keep talking openly about your thoughts and feelings and secondly be honest with him and expect the same in return. that way there are no surprises and you both know where you stand. I wish you the best of luck. x

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monty,

Oh the sweetness of a relationship that has the possibility of being more. It sounds like you’ve been able to really get to know each other over the last 3 or so years. I can understand the bittersweet feelings when you finally meet, spend such close time together and yet know that the physical distance between you is going to get wider. Are you able to talk to him about what you are feeling? Have you felt comfortable asking him how he feels? It really does seem like a conversation would be a thing to do before you decide to do anything else. Oh I wish you well with this my friend.

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From: Happy Unicorn Rider

Hi there! It really seems like the easiest way to figure it out is to ask him. Have an open and honest conversarion. Best wishes! :heart:

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Hi Monty, welcome to HeartSupport. Thank you for sharing your story.

I’m happy that you have managed to meet somebody, which is not easy these days, and I’m sorry to hear that after such a lovely few days, you are starting to question it.

I relate to your anxiousness in approaching your issues with him, but you will have to have the conversation to move forward honestly in the relationship. Take your time; there is no rush; broach the subject at your own pace.

I don’t want to sound negative, but please consider how you may feel if this doesn’t go how you hope. Make sure you have some coping mechanisms ready, just in case.

I wish you the best of luck in your future.

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I’m the same way, monty. I hate it and once i even got laughed in my face after asking a girl out. I know you may hear this a lot, but my best possible advice is TAKE IT SLOW!!! Taking it slow could be the difference between a possible spouse and a lost friend!!! I just wanna let you know that you guys WILL have days that you argue, or feel like you hate each-other but stick with them because no longer how stupid they seen, that special person will be YOUR idiot.

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Oh my gosh i really feel bad for you just remember you can always talk to him