With all these women talking about their stories of assault in the gaming and streaming industry, my own experience is coming back up for me. I’m feeling like I did back then. Worthless, helpless, hopeless - tarnished. Like no one can love me after what was done to me.
Hey there - thank you for reaching out for support today. The stories being shared right now of sexual assault, rape and harassment can be really triggering for others who have been there. I would encourage you to sit with your pain, to honor it, give it space to breathe through you. Even when you feel you’re back to square one - if you’ve done the work in the past to heal and felt you moved on, this is temporary. Plus there’s always more to discover about yourself through your past and present. I hate that you’re feeling tarnished. What happened to you was not your fault, that’s on them, not on you.
In case you need these, here are the domestic violence hotline and website for the US:
You are worthy of love, you are enough and you MATTER.
You are definitely not tarnished and it wasn’t your fault. Take time for yourself and take deep breaths if you start to feel panicked.
You deserve love; what happened is not your fault and does not change that fact. These things do not ruin us. You are strong, and the world is a better place with you in it.
You are not alone, there will always be an open ear for you, and I hope you know whatever happened was not your fault. Healing takes time, we believe in you <3
You Deserve love we all deserve Love no matter the Gender abuse can happen and it is tragic when it does I have been abused myself. I felt like I couldn’t be loved again just like you but you can and you will. I and everyone here is here for you we are rooting for you we love you! Stay Strong Friend and thanks for feeling brave enough to ask for support! XOXO Phantom
Oh, friend. My heart goes out to you. I spent a huge part of the night crying my soul out for the same reason. Triggers that affected me more than I thought. Feeling worthless and absolutely defeated. Almost pressured sometimes by seeing everyone being open about this while I can’t - even though I am so grateful for everyone who’ve been so brave by sharing.
What happened may be part of your story, but it doesn’t define you. You are not guilty. And you are so, so loved. Shame can be so destructive. Yet you are here, sharing about how you feel. This shows how strong you are despite all of this. And it allows us to send some love your way.
It’s okay to take the time you need to process. To do what makes you feel safe and remains healthy, even if it implies to step back from Twitch or social medias, at least temporarily. When there’s so many deep emotions all at once, we can always try to welcome how we feel just as it is. There’s no wrong or right way to feel. Only what we feel, and this has to be respected.
You are loved, friend. What you’ve been through will never change that. And none of this was your fault.
Thinking of you. Rooting for you. Sending tons of love your way.