My anxiety has been spiking

Hi.

The past couple of days my anxiety has spiked, and it has stayed spiked for 2 days.

I was being ripped in all directions at work due to a high priority project I was assigned to at work while my other work has been uncharacteristically difficult this week. I told my boss something has to give so shes keeping me on the project and letting my teammates take point on my other work.

Kiera is in a phase or something where all she does is scream and cry which probably plays a large roll as well. And Ive been trying to do more housework but Im in the verge of a meltdown with sensory overload and still have to cook dinner and clean the house.

I even broke out my weighted blanket.

Its just hard.

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Wow, Sapphire, that sounds incredibly overwhelming; no wonder your anxiety is peaking.

I’m sure it would help if you could find time to relax and focus on something that brings you inner peace. Could you get some time alone? Maybe a family member or a sitter could have Kiera for a few hours to give you a chance to have some free time. Spend that time doing something that calms your anxiety.

Trying to juggle too many balls is incredibly hard, and there is no shame in asking for some help.

Remember you.

I hope you find some peace.

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I very rarely get time away from Kiera. Generally only about 3 hours every month or so, so whereas in my pre-mom life I would just chill in a dark room, its just not really possible anymore. Too much to do.

If you can’t get away, can somebody come to you, even somebody paid?

It would help if you found a way to create some time for yourself, and you can do it. It’s a matter of finding what works for you.

I dont really trust anyone I know to watch Kiera who would be able to. I guess thats my fault but whatever I guess. I would rather she be safe than I get alone time. So I dont know.

What do you think could happen to help improve your situation?

Maybe if I had a day to recharge my batteries without having to worry about Kiera or anything. But that kinda comes back around to the above comments. I can hear her cursing me from her bedroom now.

At some point, you will have to let somebody else in. You know that you cannot do this alone. I appreciate you want to keep Kiera safe, but part of doing that is being physically and mentally healthy.

It is time to find somebody to let in; a social worker, a neighbour, a therapist, or a family member.

Who do you think you would feel most comfortable trusting?

Have you tried calm down methods like a calm jar or the grounding method or the journal method? If not i could help you

My family is full of addicts and abusers who ruined my life and I refuse to let them ruin hers too. Not to mention her health problems, specifically her feeding tube. I have 1 family friend that watches her those few hours a month.

Grounding and journaling dont tend to help me. I dont know what a calm jar is.

Quiet helps me, I just dont get it much anymore.

Oh sapphire, I’m so sorry this week has been stressful. Hopefully with your team mates helping take on some other work stuff it’ll feel easier!

You are doing so amazing, I can’t imagine what it’s been like, but I just really wanted to let you know that I’m proud of the work you put in to caring for Keira and for trying to find the balance of work and housework.

How good are weighted blankets! Always my go to for comfort too. That and cheesy movies.
Hoping this week is a bit lighter for you x

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It does help to have teammates help with my normal work. I managed to close one of my orders yesterday and will be able to close another one on Monday, and it looks like the last one will be assigned to someone else because it was created in an unusual way (cant go into details with the nature of the work). I managed to get 10 times as much work done yesterday, no joke.

Now my husband is getting sick. Never a dull moment.

I do like weighted blankets but I think I need a heavier one.

Also I did some research and it seems maybe Kieras phase may be brought on by insecurities caused by her learning of object permanence. Apparently since babies dont really have a sense for time, when they learn of object permanence it can make the more aware of your whereabouts and they worry more if they cant have constant reassurance. It makes sense, but doesn’t change that I cant work and hold her at the same time.

Well a calm jar is a jar with glitter inside it but once you shake it the glitter goes all over the place think of it as your mind when getting anxiety and breath as the glitter sets I can tell you how to make it if you want

Like a snow globe? (20 character limit)

Yep it’s just like a snow globe except it’s in your favourite colour

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