My break up is killing me

Hi y’all.
I’m going through a really tough break up. He originally told me he was leaving to ‘work on himself’ and we would be together one day. I just found out two days ago that he was actually cheating on me throughout the end of our relationship.
I feel like everything I thought would be my future is gone, my friend is gone and I have nobody to talk to.
And I think the reason I’m struggling the most is because my life right now is just empty. No job, no friends, nothing to do, no substance.
I have no idea how to progress from here. Help?

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Breakups can be hard and devastating when you find out the person you loved and trusted was cheating on you. I feel your pain and I have been there.
The first thing I would like to say is that he cheated on you and that shows you who he truly is. So in the words of Maya Agelou “When someone shows you who they are believe them the first time”.
You don’t deserve that disrespect. So maybe you can see that this is probably a good thing.
Don’t settle for anything less than the respect that you deserve.

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Hello Nevxrmeant. Wow, I’m in awe of how relatable this post it. My best friend and I eventually fell for each other & began dating. I was falling hard & fast & by the looks of it, he felt the same. He talked about our future; marriage,
everything. For someone like me: girl whose never felt good enough or worthy enough to be loved, due to my past traumas, I couldn’t believe it. But he made me believe it. He talked to me like no one ever had- “I didn’t deserve him. I was too good to be true!”…
It was bullshit. He wasn’t ready for that type of relationship YET- but we’d definitely be together in the future. He didn’t cheat on me, but had no intention of keeping that promise either. I know he just didn’t want to hurt me more so thought lying again would be easier. He jumped right back into the game. To say I was a mess is an understatement. I hated, not even him, but myself for being so stupid & falling for it & believing someone could feel that way about me. I gave him so much; he literally was my world & then it was gone. I cried & sobbed & drank…then drank more. It shouldn’t have let it get to me so much, but I felt so disposable. So easy to give up. It just brought back my childhood trauma again & how I felt used… This was in 2019. I can say I’m over him, but not over what I consider my stupidity. I went to therapy & it’s been a process to forgive myself. I don’t have a job & feel like I have no sense of direction at times honestly. My mental health has kept me from achieving a lot. People always said find a hobby or exercise. How do you even start that when your mentally drained & done south everything!..What helped me? Time. I don’t think there’s a way out because something always reminds you of that person during that stage, so it’s just going to take time. I eventually did take up a hobbies of gardening & embroidering. It keeps my mind occupied for hours & I’m no longer in bed all day every day. It’s really just going to be a matter of time and finding something that makes you feel like you have your own worth…and that your worth does not depend on another person. Because you’re much more valuable than you know.
At least that’s what my process was and still is…sending love your way❤

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That’s what I’m trying to do, I already blocked him on everything and I’m trying to accept that this is a new stage of my life. The thing that is affecting me is that, I thought someone cared about me and they didn’t- when I put so much energy into caring about him.

I’m trying to find other things in my life to focus on, and to find hope in, but there isn’t much :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Hi @Nevxrmeant

The HeartSupport Houston team responded to your post here. Hold fast friend, and lean on our community!

  • John
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Wow I just watched that video and it means so much to see some actual real people talking about my struggles and feeling that support.
I really hope Morgan is doing well- I want to try and reach them on discord if I can for a chat.

Thanks for this :heart:

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