my dreams started being scarier every night.
i either dream him, my best friends, being in someone else’s body, because he is dead.
i dream my suicide, i wake up exactly when my soul exits my body.
i dream running out of my house, and be free, to become happy.
i love to sleep because it makes me avoid my issues. i pray to not wake up tomorrow, everynight before falling asleep.
I’m sorry you had some rough nights before you posted this. Dreams can be very scary, indeed, or feel so real at the moment. It’s not always easy to wake up and handle this transition between a dream and reality, as it affects us emotionally too. With what you describe here, it seems obvious that you’ve been under a lot of stress lately. It makes sense that it affects your nights too, even though I wish you could know more peaceful nights these days. It’s not going to be like this forever, but you’ll need to take care of yourself in the meantime. Keep sharing your heart as you’ve been doing here for the past few weeks, keep reaching out in sace places and to safe people, maybe even consider journaling as it could help you to process your thoughts and emotions while you’re still awake. Things can and will get better, friend. You’re not alone right now.
I’m glad that you keep waking up. Grateful that you are with us here, Bianka.