recently i’ve been having a rough time with my friend i’ll call them Mia so me and Mia have been having some issues recently or more they’ve been having issues with me they act like they don’t care abt me at all they’ve told me i’m stopping them from having a life because i wanted to hang out with them i get i am kinda clingy and get that they don’t always wanna hang out with me witch is completely understandable i just think they could have said something less extreme when i told them i was upset that they’d said that they got mad at me and i was the only one who said sorry i explained that i was going through a rough time (i’ve been struggling with SH and they know that) and hanging out with people helps take my mind off it and they just say “Oh.” i’ve told them other times i’m struggling and they just glaze over it they don’t care another time Mia called me a guilt tripper for expressing my feelings and then just last night i was talking about my special interest so i was sending alot of messages and they kinda never answered then this morning i needed to tell them somthing and they didn’t answer (i’m not mad they didn’t answer i get they could be busy) i needed to get ahold of them so i message them on the messenger app instead of snap only to find out they told off the snap notifs because i was talking about my special interest and every time we’re on call i have to say their name muliple times and say the same thing over and over just to get Mia to know what i’m saying they never pay attention when i’m talking and they always claim they’ll pay attention this time along with this a few days ago they were at my house and we were on our phones and they needed to go home soon so i’m trying to ask if we could do somthing just for them to ignore me to watch tiktok they ignored me to watch the kardashion show on tiktok i wish i was kidding all these things upset me but i can’t tell Mia because they’ll get mad at me and ignore me so i wont get anything done and the problem will just get worse i always am the one saying sorry because i was upset with them
Hey foxes, did you get a chance to read the replies to your last post?
Sounds like your friend had been asking for a little space, do you think that perhaps sending them so many messages might have overwhelmed them?
So maybe it could be a good idea to start talking to them about those boundaries.
As much as we feel better having those people around us, we also have to respect when they need some time for themselves.
Sometimes when we feel like someone is dependant on us to be their sole support, it can feel very overwhelming. It can feel like a very big responsibility, so maybe if you’ve been struggling with SH it could be that reaching out to a professional will help you and also take that pressure off your friend.
So maybe you can think of some things you enjoy doing when your friend us busy or hasn’t replied that will help take your mind off worrying.
hi friend,
thank you for sharing what you’re going through with mia. with neko’s reply above, i want to also echo how setting clear boundaries and having open dialogues on what you’re both feeling can help strengthen y’all’s friendship. with your special interests, i totally get how fun sharing things about your favorite topics can be! with so many online communities out there, maybe there’s a discord server or other safe site with people sharing your interests gather! i personally love joining new discord servers centered around a fav show or hobby because we all understand each other so well! i hope you’re able to find communities with similar interests so you don’t feel so alone in sharing what brings you joy! wishing you so much luck in this journey you’re on. you got this, i believe in you!
love,
twix
Hi again Foxes
After reading this post, I would like to say the same as I did on the last one but add that I think perhaps your friend is just trying to set boundaries with you but just not doing it in the most sensitive of ways.
Sometimes when you contact someone you have to bear in mind that they may have other things going on and they may not be able to respond to you for a while, if you then question that it is upsetting as you are questioning their loyalty which is not the best thing you can do.
I would encourage you to take a little break from Mia, both have some breathing space and then as I said before talk about what you both want in an honest discussion. then you dont have to guess what eachother are thinking, you will know. Good luck. Lisa.
I’m sorry you’re struggling with getting your friend to talk to you. Have you read the replies to your previous post? I feel like they will give you good insight on boundaries. It’s just a thought, but It seems like your friend for some reason isn’t able to support you. Maybe the topic of SH scares them and they don’t know what to say. This can look like they don’t care, but that might not be the case.
I will encourage you to read the replies for your last post if you haven’t. You matter