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My life feels broken now

My parents divorced last year and my father has been living at his own place; I’ve been living with my mother and siblings at home.

My mother just told me that she can not afford to live in this house anymore and is planning to move away with my siblings. My father will move in again and own the house. She wants to take me, but I could not face moving to a strange house and starting my entire life over. My other option is to stay here with my dad who never put me first, accepted me for who I am, has made triggering comments related to eating, and yelled at me almost every day of my life. I haven’t spoken to him since October.

Everything was going okay (I am close to discharging from an eating disorder outpatient clinic, I’m catching up on schoolwork, have close friends who support me) until this happened. Now everything seems dark and broken and there’s no solution. Nothing will ever be good again.

What the hell do I do with my life?

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It sounds like there are pros and cons to living with either your mother or father. You should probably write them down and see which is the “Lesser Evil”. No decision will be perfect. The decision you make is the best one and stick with it when you follow through. Once that is done make the best of the situation.

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Yea I can definitely see the pros and cons of your living situation. Sounds like maybe it would be worth really sitting down with your mom and maybe separately a counselor where you can just talk about what you are feeling about all of this. Maybe a counselor can help you find that healthy balance for you and help pin point which option would be better for you. Can you maybe do a trial period both with mom and dad to see what feels better for you?

How’s the relationship with your mom? Things sound kinda strained with dad, but do you and mom get along okay? Is she someone you can comfortably talk to about this?

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