So I try not to let my appearance and weight get to me and I try to make a change, but nothing is working and it’s becoming discouraging. I’m getting ready to turn thirty and I still have acne, my hair is a mess all the time, and I would actually love to be able to perfect makeup. But I am a mom of three who works all the time. So on a day to day basis, I look like a bum. I try getting my hair done, but as soon as it gets itchy, I mess it up or take it down. I have plenty of makeup, no time to make it look decent. And as far as my weight go. I want to lose weight, but I am steady gaining. It’s hard to lose weight when you had two c-sections and on so many medications. I tried changing my diet and then there’s the plain old fact that I barely eat anyways.
I know if I could put more effort into these things I would feel better, but I’m always exhausted, always parenting or working, and my attention span and mood swings don’t help. I called my sister (fellow mother as well) and told her, I just want to be able to look pretty. As I was getting the words out I teared up, because this feeling it’s working its way through me more and more. I just don’t feel right about it. I know I should be accepting of myself but I can’t right now.