@Daisy,
I know you’re not looking for any response, and there’s no way mine will do any justice to what you bravely shared, but I wanted to let you know that I’ve read all of it, and I feel with you.
The fear of being rejected if you talk, or making others sad because it would shake their perception of the world, the fear of being touched yet the need for closeness, of being hurt if you are seen yet the desire to do your part in this life. The numerous questions about what should be said or done in so many situations, of being inadequate and utterly broken. The anger towards those who betrayed and hurt you, against yourself for feeling like you can’t move on, against this world for being what it is, against a missing justice… all of this, I feel with you.
This blog entry shows how much your voice is deep, impactful, and real. You haven’t said your last word. So please, be safe. Don’t give up on yourself. This world is ugly, messed up. Some people’s souls are dark beyond words. But you are a light my friend. I see you glowing and shining through your pain. This world needs so much of it, so much of you. You belong.
If there’s a lesson this life has told me, it’s that family is the one we choose. You have a family right here where you are loved as you are. A place where you belong, every single day, whether you are active or silent. A place where people genuinely listen and care. A refuge when reality feels unbearable.
You and I have been on this forum for almost the same time and I’ve always been inspired by the thoughtful words you’ve shared around here, by this courage that you’ve mustered from your vulnerability, over and over again. I see you Daisy. I care about you. Even from a place of silence.
I wish I could just sit next to you right now and be a safe presence, even just for a second. No unwanted hug, no unwanted words. Only an intuitive and genuine love, care, peace found in silence. A time slowed down in the middle of a world that never stops to be so noisy, and heavy. So I’ll leave it at this, hoping that you can feel that energy on your end today, even through pixelated words. My thoughts, my heart are with you.
PS - Microsmos#1923 (Discord). Anytime.
