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Need Help I'm a porn addict and I just hired an escort


#1

The title says it all. I hired an escort and had sex. Now I feel like there’s nowhere to turn, so I decided to come here. I feel like I’ve failed at being a Christian. I guess suppose those reading this will wonder if I was really a Christian at all. Please help


#2

@Moowno2

Hello. Nice to meet you. Thank you for sharing. It means a lot to the community. I want to say is that you are not a horrible person. Everybody makes mistakes. It is up to us to take ownership, learn from it, and move on. I struggle with porn too. I fantasize and masturbate. In the end, it didn’t make me a happy person. I just have guilt and shame. Even when I relapse, I still feel it. I never had sex, so I cannot relate to your situation. I know sex is an amazing gift, it is only for marriage, and God made it beautiful. I encourage you to pray to the Holy Spirit to resist the temptation, get away from your bondage of sin, get back to the cross, and surrender to Christ. He is the only One who can transform your life. Just trust Him. If you want to vent more, this forum is open. I hope you are having a great weekend. Peace.


#3

Thank you for being so vulnerable. You are so loved. Even if you don’t believe it right know the truth is that you in forgiven and incredibly loved.
The things you struggle with and your actions do not disqualify you from being a Christian or from the love of Christ. Jesus died on the cross for you because he saw your life as a valuable treasure. The feelings of regret and shame do not come from him

“for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus,”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭3:23-24‬ ‭

Maybe try asking someone you trust and wouldn’t be judgmental to help keep you accountable. If that’s to hard this website is an amazing resource https://www.xxxchurch.com/get-help?gclid=Cj0KCQiA14TjBRD_ARIsAOCmO9Yvjw8H1fBxXJiEJ_d6bjUvpzAwHvKxlKk2-uzp-FQRmHWcjZhvLe4aAqDdEALw_wcB
You are not alone. As you try to come out is this please give yourself the grace for relapses. You are so brave for coming here. You have already been forgiven now it’s learning to forgive yourself.

With love
Loveinflyleaf


#4

You didn’t fail, you just being a human being that just do what it believes is right.


#5

Hey friend,

None of this makes you less Christian or a failure. I know how deep these tunnels can go and sometimes it really feels like you’ve gone too far to be forgiven. But I promise you, that is never the case. That is the beauty of the gospel, that Christ died for us while we were still sinners. He verbally forgave all of us, even those who physically killed him.

You are not alone. That resource @Loveinflyleaf shared looks great and the stats on there show that others are struggling with this too. Here’s one of those stats: 51% of pastors say porn is a real temptation. 51% of pastors. Of course that’s not a great reality, but I hope it helps you to realize that you are not alone and you are not passed the point of saving.

All of our journeys are different, but I can promise you that there is recovery from sexual addiction. And there is relapse. I’ve been there myself and I still struggle, but with repentance and work and striving to be better, you will heal and it will become easier.

Probably the number one thing that will help is accountability. I don’t have the best accountability right now and I have been struggling with addiction more recently, but when I had more accountability and deeper accountability things were much easier. So I would urge you to seek that, even if it’s uncomfortable. As long as you trust the person and they can listen without sharing it with others or judging you, it’s way worth it.

There is always healing. There is no sin that is not wiped clean by honestly seeking the Lord. You can do this. We believe in you.

God Bless,
Zachary


#6

AVJR, Loveinflyleaf, Spacecat, and zleif. Thanks for the responses, I’ll definitely look into xxxchurch. One of the hardest parts for me is recurring thoughts. I constantly think of what I did and it only hurts more. The only thing I do is continuously ask God to remove the thoughts from my head. Again, I thank all of you for your help and care.


#7

@Moowno2 a lot of that just comes with healing and time. I still struggle with reoccurring thoughts sometimes but it dose get better over time. :heart:


#8

@Moowno2 I beg you to check your messages. I love you friend, you are not alone.


#9

IF you’re questioning whether or not that you’re a Christian than you have already answered yourself. Am I saying you’re not a Christian? Not by any means. I met Christians who were very flirty and wanted to have sex with a heathen like me and had.

It is all the matter of perspectives and all the perspectives people have don’t matter one bit. The one perspective that does matter is “god’s” just kidding. Nope it is yours.

I am sorry that you feel like you’re a failure as a Christian. Let me make an assurance that when you mentioned Christian I immediately thought of Jesus Christ. So I don’t know if that helps or not.

I mean to me from the studies I conducted that there are a lot of people who are Christians that fail at being Chrsitians yet it has nothing to do with them “sinning” or being “sinners”. It has more to do with their taking on the mantle of “God” for themselves and handing out judgement on behalf of “God”. That is just my opinion that I guess doesn’t mean much because I am an Agnostic Pagan.

I personally applaud you. Not because what you did was not very “Christian”. Mainly because you had a problem, you made a decision and you solved the problem you had at the moment you had it.

The problem you solved was you wanted to have sex and desired sex. I am not encouraging a habit or anything. I am just explaining something from an objective perspective.