I relapsed in my self-harm again because apparently a lot can happen in an hour… Who knew?
So, recently I’ve been keeping matches in my room because my neighbour has been smoking so much damn weed that sometimes it’ll start to stink out my room, so I have them to light candles to cover that smell. Thing is, the last few days I’ve been urging to harm, and having thrown out my blades, they were all I have.
I’ve never really thought about burning myself as a way of self-harming before, I don’t really know why I did it. I just did. Talking about this abuse stuff for my Step 4 is just too much it seems, and having heard my mum basically say everything I did for her meant nothing, really was the finishing touch that pushed me, so I took out a bunch of matches and well… You can guess what happened from there.
I’ve been so good at praying and talking about this stuff instead of harming, however it seems that every time I finally think I’m settling into those healthier habits, I end up relapsing over something stupid like this.
Sorry for not really making much sense