What do you do when you miss someone that wants nothing to do with you… how do you deal with no contact…i have been struggling so bad… with no contact… its been months… ive done all i can think of… ive been doing everything and anything to distract myself. Ive listened to music. Colored. Made poems. Ive written about it. I picked up reading. I talk to my counselor. But nothing i do works… i want to text her more than anything… i want to talk with her i want her to love me and miss me. I dont know how to just let it go. My whole life was given to her… and she doesnt care… she doesnt want me around… i dont want to do this life without her… im in a relationship currently… and all i can think about is her. And i dont want too focus on her i wanna focus on my bf bc i do love him and want to marry him… but my heart cant let go of her. I cant function right without her. My brain knows she is so incredibly toxic… she is abusive mentally… shes narcissistic… manipulative… and she never takes accountability for her own actions and blames everything on me when things go wrong. I know shes bad. And ik i dont deserve that. But she was my best friend and i miss her so fucking much i feel so lost and incomplete without her…
Hi Bow,
My heart goes out to you. This sounds really difficult. It seems like you are really trying everything and you have some healthy people around you. I know it can frustrating when it seems like nothing is working. Remember to show yourself some love and grace. You were in a toxic relationship and now you’re out of it. That’s a big step. Small steps from here might seem insignificant or like they’re “not working”. Over time they’ll accumulate and hopefully you’ll be able to look back and see how far you’ve come. I really appreciate you sharing the pain you’re feeling. Hang in there, Bow. You’re worth it!
With Love,
Satty,
Hey,
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Missing someone who isn’t in your life anymore is incredibly tough, especially when they were such a big part of your world. It’s okay to feel lost and confused right now. It’s normal to struggle with moving on from someone who had such a significant impact on your life.
It sounds like you’ve been trying so hard to cope and keep yourself distracted with different activities, which is really commendable. The pain persists sometimes, and even the best distractions can’t fully replace the emotional connection we’re missing.
It’s clear that you recognize the toxic aspects of this past relationship, and that’s an important step. It’s also important to remember that just because you know something isn’t good for you doesn’t mean it’s easy to let go. Emotions aren’t always logical, and your heart can be stubborn, even when your brain knows what’s best.
One thing that might help is giving yourself permission to feel sad about this loss without judgment. It’s okay to grieve the end of the relationship, and it doesn’t mean you’re not moving forward. Healing often comes in waves, and it might take time before you start feeling more at peace.
Since you’re in a relationship and truly care about your current partner, it could be helpful to focus on the positive aspects of your present situation. Maybe try to nurture that relationship and remind yourself of why you’re with your boyfriend. Being kind to yourself and allowing yourself to feel these emotions is part of the process.
Talking to your counselor about how you’re feeling might also provide additional support and strategies to help you work through this. Sometimes, having someone to guide you through the process can make a big difference.
You’re doing a great job by reaching out and seeking help. It takes strength to face these feelings and work through them. Keep taking it one day at a time, and remember, it’s okay to feel lost sometimes. You’re not alone in this.