Not sure where I am or where I'm going

So I haven’t been around here for a while, and mostly things have been feeling okay. My relationships are all doing very well. I’m just not sure where I’m going at this point. I’m aspiring to be a game developer but it’s really difficult when I struggle with ideas. And art. And music/sound design. You get the point. I’m feeling competent enough with the language and engine, I just have nothing in mind to make. A friend of mine had an idea for a game and could handle the art and music, but she’s been busy with school and I don’t feel comfortable just waiting around until she’s available.

Speaking of, I feel a lot of good options to actually earn myself some money are locked away behind school. I tried going to a community college a couple years back but I struggled with all the classes that weren’t exactly what I was interested in learning. I also tried an IT job while I was there but either due to the circumstances or the job itself it went poorly quickly. I’m aware of trade schools and things like them, but my experience with that short-lived job has really left a bad impression.

I do stream playing some games with friends in an attempt to get my name out there before my first game, and for what it’s worth I’ve been able to start monetizing that as of recently, but I don’t even know how long I have to find something that would do enough for me financially. I had intended to get some tech certifications like A+, but at this point I’m not even sure what I’d do with it. Normal jobs just don’t feel like a good fit, not for lack of trying. My ideal job would be something with a flexible schedule where I get paid for what I produce instead of how much time I spend regardless of how empty that time is. I don’t see that in the options (as far as normal jobs go) that are available to me, though I could search more.

In short, it feels like all ways lead to a dead end, chance, or complete unknowns. Anyone have any advice for any of this? How to effectively come up with ideas (since music and art can be sourced elsewhere)? Or something I could do to produce some other product people would want? I don’t live near terribly many people so something like woodworking or any other physical product or service has its limitations as much as I’ve enjoyed that in the past (I’m not terribly skilled in it nor do I have access to many tools, either). I genuinely don’t know what I am at this point or what I’ll be even 2 months from now. Big thanks in advance for any help that could be provided

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It’s hard to advise without knowing where your aptitudes lie. My grandson did monetize gaming, but he never got rich from it. I think he missed out on the profits he could’ve made from Youtube. If you’re going to work in that area, even as a part time thing, you really need decent equipment and an ISP capable of significant bandwidth. He did other things to make money as well. He traveled and stocked new Dollar stores, worked in a UPS warehouse, among other things.

It would be worthwhile if you went to a college, even a two year one, and asked for career counseling. They offer aptitude testing and can produce realistic options for you.

When you’re starting out, you’re at a disadvantage because employers usually want workers who are already experienced. In the absence of experience, training in a trade or advanced education, employment options are limited. A lot of young people have to work crappy jobs while attending school or otherwise qualifying themselves for better ones.

Practically no one is sure where they’re going when they start their careers or even choose a major in college. Despite that, a direction needs to be chosen, otherwise you’ll go nowhere. Students change their majors frequently because they have no way of knowing what they’re truly interested in until they begin taking a path toward what they think they want to do. At the same time, even the paths that are abandoned provide experience that is helpful when a person finds their true path.

Things were simpler for me because I dropped out of school at 15, and the only priority I had was to do something in order to eat. At the time, it never occurred to me that I should look for something meaningful or fulfilling. For me at the time, eating and having a place to sleep was all the fulfillment I could hope for. So I worked a bunch of crappy jobs, but did develop a decent work ethic while I was at it, and finally after several years, returned to school.

Anyway, it seems that your options are to decide if you want to pursue a degree, and maybe work part time (or you can do what I did, which was to work nights full time and attend school full time during the day), find a job you can tolerate until you’ve had time to choose what you want to do next, become a gigolo (just kidding), or become self-employed, perhaps as a computer consultant or providing some other service. No doubt, there are other options, like winning the lottery or something.

If you really want to develop games, it’s something you can do while holding down some kind of job that feeds you while you’re doing it.

You can’t really be sure of where you’re going till you get there. You can only pick a direction and commit to it until you figure out how well it’s going to work for you. A lot of times, you have to “pay your dues,” or put up with a measure of tedium and drudgery before you can benefit from your chosen direction.

You probably have some intuition regarding what’s your best move. It’s a starting point when considering what’s feasible.