I hate myself and I think this is my last attempt at saving myself as I’m slowly just becoming more and more apathetic towards life. I was a Christian my entire life up until a few years ago. I never dated anyone, even with having a few chances to go out with some amazing women, until I was 19. I guess I am a super emotional guy so I never cared to just date for the fun of it, I knew exactly what I was looking for and didn’t care if anyone else came along. When I was 19 I finally found that girl that was completely perfect for me. She was a beautiful, kindhearted, funny, Christian girl. We were friends for a few months and talked for awhile. I know I’m completely delusional and pathetic for this but I was completely in love with her. Everything I wanted in someone was who she was and I’d been searching for someone like that my entire life and when she finally said that she didn’t think she was interested it hurt. Shortly after I started balding and it happened fast. I’m 22 now and completely bald and even the attention I use to get from other women has completely disappeared. I tried the whole “oh just shave it, grow a beard, and hit the gym bro!!!” thing and I felt super confident for a few months but still no interest from anyone. I’ve since gained a ton of weight and I can’t focus or study for any of my classes (dropping all except one this semester). I started college last year so I’m already so far behind in life and with most of my friends who are around the same age as me being married I just feel like I can’t catch up. I won’t kill myself because I still believe God is real but I just don’t care about living anymore. The life I wanted just seems too far out of reach. Sorry the obnoxiously long post
Hey man. I’d say dont compare yourself to other people your age. To each their own you know. You dont have a wife or kids yet, that doesnt mean anything. I’m 38 and still working on my bachelor’s degree. I do believe things happen for a reason. Maybe instead of hitting the gym to get in shape to impress other people, find something that YOU enjoy. If you find yourself always trying to impress others you’ll never be happy. I hope this helps and finds you well man.
Hey bud, first off thank you for posting this. The only advice I can give you is to not focus on the whole idea that you need to be married with 2.3 kids, with a degree/career by the time you turn 25 that seldomly ever happens and is an old white Christian way of thinking. I know the whole going bald thing is a real shot in your confidence so focus on showing what kind of person you are.
Hey there, friend! I’ve been down this path you’re taking, with struggling in faith. It’s so tough because you so badly want God to be real, but he never seems to make his appearance known when you feel like you need him the most. Or just that the thought of a perfect, all knowing father who is love itself and a being who literally created everything wants to have a close relationship with us just seems to good to be true.
Here’s a thought… why don’t you ask God, if he exists, to try to help you find love. Keep asking him for a while and talking with him about it, and then if nothing changes at all after a week or 2- then you can decide. I understand that it would be really awkward talking to something/someone that may not even be real (trust me, I’ve been there) but there’s really only one way to find out. Just try, and if it’s too hard, that’s ok! Be proud of yourself for putting yourself out there emotionally.
Another thing! Listen, I couldn’t care less about how anyone looks- unless you have spinach in your teeth, because that’s a yikes. Believe me when I say I’m not the only one who thinks this way. Many, many people find it disturbing when people have spinach in their teeth. Lol, just kidding. But yeah, trust me, not many girls actually do care all that much about their significant others’ looks. And the kind of people who care all that much are not the type of people you wanna be dating, just saying!
Also, so what if you don’t have any hair on the top of your head! Some people can really rock the bald look! Plus, nobody else cares about how you look more than you do. We all have our insecurities, and we’re usually too wrapped up in our own to notice what another person might dislike about their appearance.
Go live life, handsome.