Partner Cheated & Got Someone Pregnant For The Second Time

Has someone experienced a partner cheating for the second time and having a baby for the second time after cheating I need answers, I love him and I wanna try making it work but I feel like everybody is gonna call me stupid and I shouldn’t be with him and I am in a mixed situation right now because I do not want ti be judged.

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Ouch! :cry:

I think there’s something very wise in you to bring up fear of judgement (shame) in the same post as getting hurt by people who aren’t considerate of you. I imagine they’re related.

I’m guessing it’s uncommon, but I don’t think any of us are truly alone in any experience we have…just sometimes unlikely to be in the same place at the same time.

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Yeah I am hurt but I can’t seem to cry much I may shed a tear or two but nothing serious, am I dumb if I take him back after time and space?

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I just really need some advice because I love him.

Gotcha, I too struggle to cry. Sometimes I look to my actions and thoughts to infer what I feel, because I am so disconnected from my sensations and body :slightly_frowning_face:

You seem to see the situation and write well. I suspect you are quite cognitively adept, at least some part of you that may not be fully owned and embraced.

It seems like some part of you is willing to accept how he’s behaved and impacted you (and the other women and their embryos)! Seems like he may be hurtfully careless at times… inconsiderate of anyone but himself…at least at times.

I imagine you’re getting something in the relationship that is so worth it to you that you are willing to consider taking him back again, despite how inconsiderate and hurtful that was. I don’t think it’s dumb, just likely what you’re evaluating as the best option you have.

I think self reflection, creativity, and lots of support could help you find a much better option, where you’re getting whatever you get in that relationship with him, but are also experiencing empathy from your significant other, and see their love in their actions.

Do you believe he will grow, self reflect, admit mistakes, build trust, repair when he’s wronged or hurt… Do you believe he will honor you and your relationship?

I feel that me giving space and time away from him, not communicating like I used to, and not being available for him when he needs me because he needs to learn from his actions this time around it isn’t okay at all and I just don’t want to be judged by people, he said to me that he wants to work things out but if I want to leave he has to accept that as well but he is asking me to stay but I think time and space would be what’s best for now so he knows what he has done and he needs to understand it is completely wrong, I believe he is afraid of losing me at this point and he needs to feel that fear for a few weeks because it isn’t fair.

So is taking the time away from him also about not being judged? Or how does that fit in?

Sounds like you found a sense of control, and you’re confident about what you want to do.

No taking space for me is more so giving myself some time to heal as well as thinking.

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I hope you do find healing in this time :revolving_hearts:

I think I am, and with the help of my psychic reader she has told me do not worry what others think worry about what benefits you guys relationship so I will take her advice and yours as well.

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