I went about 2 days without cutting my arm/wrist a few days ago, I can’t remember if it was before or after the 2 days, but I cut my arm and wrist 26 times. Last night I didn’t cut my arm/wrist either. Surprisingly. I’ve been really stressed out lately, and I thought I was going to stop using heart support for specific reasons but I guess not. Even though there are people around me I just feel really lonely. I really just wish me and my favorite person were face to face so he could just hug me and me hug him and everything would be okay, but we aren’t face to face, and I don’t have anyone who I know who I can just hug without them being like Woah wth. I’m eating a little more I think, and I’m showering more which is good. So there are some improvements I guess.
Congrats for those improvements - and for taking the time to acknowledge your progress. No matter how big or small it seems to you, eating a little more, showering and spending two days without cutting is progress! Good ways to take care of yourself, of your body and your mind at the same time. Proud of you, friend.
I’m so sorry you feel alone though. With the pandemic, it’s been incredibly heartbreaking to not be able to hug the people we love. I feel that too, a lot. The hugs we’re going to give and receive post-lockdowns are going to be pretty intense, if you think about it. It’s something to hold on to, friend. And that day we’ll not just be happy to hug our loved ones, but we’ll also be proud for taking care of ourselves until that moment.
The way you describe this special person makes me think that this hug will be a memorable and beautiful moment for both of you. Hold fast, friend. Take good care of yourself. Your well-being is so important. And you know you’ll always have a space right here where you’ll never be truly alone, even if it’s not the same as having someone right next to you.
Sending virtual hugs your way (not the same, but definitely lots of love going your way!).
Thank you for sharing these great moments of progress with us! Progress is progress! Working on anything especially mental health requires baby steps, so recognizing the progress you’ve made is so important! So glad to hear this friend. Taking care of yourself may not always be easy but taking it a day and step at a time is well worth it!
It can be really easy to still feel alone even though we may have others around us especially in the context of the pandemic. It definitely hasn’t made connecting with people and feeling connected any easier. Like @Micro said, when the day comes when you can hug those you care so much about it will be such a joyous day and that day will most certainly come. This will not last forever. So until that day comes we are with you. We hear you, love you and are so grateful to have you as part of this community!
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