Relationship Troubles and Future

I have been with my boyfriend for over a year and a half. It has been a really good relationship but I lately we have been struggling. We have been fighting a lot over the past 3 months. He lives at my house because his mom kicked him out. I’m currently in my first year of college and planning on moving 5 hours away for college next year. He works a fast food job and has shown no motivation to work on his future. I care about him so much and I try so hard to help him get motivated but he just doesn’t. It would kill me to break up with him but so far it seems like there isn’t a light at the end of the tunnel.

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Hi Goodvibesforall, it seems like you are in a part of your life where change looks a lot different than you would have imagined. I’d imagine it’s very difficult to visualize yourself without your significant other after so much time you both have invested in the relationship the past several years. I encourage you to bring these feelings to the surface and show him just how important it is to you that life needs to progress. Naturally, this could stir up an emotional response but also bring to light the reality of what is happening. Talk to him and see what you guys can come up with. Keep us updated on what happens!

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Hi friend. That’s really hard. Loving someone who seems to be under motivated or shows no interest in progressing.

The best thing you can do is offer him love and understanding, but also to pull him aside some time and gently talk to him about the future. Tell him your goals, dreams and plans you’d like to set for yourself. Express to him that if this relationship wants to work out realistically that you need him to show that he wants that. Ask him what his goals are. What things he hopes to achieve. Maybe you guys together can work something out. I understand this situation as I have been there.

If he doesn’t show interest in making progress or moving forward, you may have to gently tell him that as much as you love him, you guys may need a break. It’s okay if you need to do that. Don’t feel guilty. You have to look out for yourself and your future. Its not in your control if he chooses not to go forward. Just be loving as you speak to him.

Sometimes relationships have to come to an end when things like this dont work out. But for your sake I hope he understand and is willing to work on it.

I wish you the best of luck, my friend. And know that we are here.

  • Kitty
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