Guys, my dad started dating, and the lady is very nice, but I haven’t met her two sons yet, I am nervous. And I may become their sister.


Could I get some tips on how to be calm when I meet them, please?:sweat:


It is natural to be nervous. Perfectly normal.
Take a step back.
Always listen to your heart and your gut.
Keep your heart open.
I think you will be able to trust your feelings. You obviously love your dad and want him to be happy. Just as he wants you to be happy.
And then be honest with your dad once you get an honest read.
You are smart. Trust and listen to your heart.


Hey Katelynn, @Swimcoach has a lot of excellent points to lean into. One thing that I would add, is to be your most authentic self and don’t do anything different than you already are.

Be there for your dad, be there for what transpires and be as present as possible. Things will work out for the best!

It’s normal to be nervous don’t worry! You’re going to have to meet then at some point and being anxious is apart of life! Everything is going to be okay, just try you’re best to keep calm. Hang in there.

It’s hard :face_exhaling::frowning: I’m sorry

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Hey dont be sorry i know things can be hard so there’s no need to apologize and to be honest I’m not even sure why you’re apologizing!

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Idk either. LoL! Thanks for the encouragement.:heartpulse:

How long have they been dating, and how serious are they?

I’m glad you like the lady, and I’m glad you seem happy that your dad is happy :slight_smile: If they’re not getting married anytime soon, you have awhile before you have to worry about new brothers. Hopefully, when the time comes to meet them, your dad and their mom can be methodical about how they introduce you and them. Meanwhile, I can’t imagine how stressful it is to imagine meeting 2 guys who will become a significant presence in your life (as someone with social anxiety, I have a hard enough time meeting friends of friends :rofl: ), but maybe take this time to visualize it while suspending your dread. This could be an exciting possibility! It could also be a very neutral introduction. Either one of those isn’t cause for dread, so try to imagine it in neutral terms. Just try, that’s all I can ask :slight_smile:

When it’s time to meet them, maybe suggest to your dad that the introduction take place in a public place like a coffee shop or putt-putt. That way, you’re not intruding on each other’s “turf,” and you have activities to help occupy yourselves while getting to know each other instead of just staring at each other trying to make conversation. Then, try to approach it as meeting new friends instead of new brothers. Again, I can’t change your reflexive reaction, but meeting new friends is less pressure than meeting new brothers, especially when they may not be your brothers for a long time :slight_smile:

Follow up on here. Let us know how you’re feeling, how your thought process is going, and eventually let us know how it goes :hrtlegolove:


From: Mamadien

katelynn, it can be really uncomfortable when your dad starts dating. It’s hard to get to know someone new that is joining your life. I’m glad she’s nice and I hope that you get along well. And it’s totally normal to be nervous about meeting other members of her family. Try not to think too far ahead with this if you can help it. Think of them as friends and treat them as such for now. If Dad’s relationship with the girl friend develops into more, you may very well already be good friends with these guys and it’ll make it easier down the road.

From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend, That all sounds exciting and nerve wracking all at the same time, just take some deep breaths, try not to think about what they will be expecting from you because they will probably be nervous themselves, any anxiety will vanish in moments I am sure. try to look forward to it and take your time. Lisa x

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Heya Katelynn,

@Swimcoach has some very sage advice there, and I don’t think I can say it any better.

Be you, and see who they are. Assuming things go well between your dad and his girlfriend, remember that you are still an individual - set your boundaries, get to know them, and let the relationship develop how it may.


Hi @Katelynn

Others have definitely put it best with how they’ve responded, but I’ll make some key notes for what I think definitely hit the mark below.

Swimcoach’s entire response is definitely some great mindfulness advice here.

Reclaimer’s be yourself advice is definitely top notch. You can only be yourself, and everyone will love and respect you for that. Be there for your dad like he’s there for you.

^ Great keypoint to remind yourself everyday. Especially in a hard time like this.

SheetMetalHead’s response is full of positvie advice. Maybe writing down how you feel in a journal may help as well.

As the others have said, try to not think so far ahead. Maybe doing some self care activities will help put your mind at ease.


Hi Katelynn! Im so sorry you’re feeling nervous about meeting them. That sounds like a new and tricky situation for sure. Whenever I am nervous about meeting new people, I try to remind myself that we’re all human and all the same! Try to stop yourself from over-thinking the situation or role playing in your head and just treat it like meeting any other random new person out in the world. A lot of times we get nervous because of the weight that we’re putting on a situation. Try to keep it light and fun and whatever happens, happens! Just be yourself and be kind and get to know them like a new friend and you’ll be great!

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Hi! I would say just be yourself and when you meet them remember that you’re meeting them as a new friend first. Expanding our changing a family dynamic can be tough, so if you need to, maybe talk to your dad about getting time for just you and him once a week so y’all can communicate how things are going. Idk the ages (yours, theirs) but hopefully you and the two other kids can find some common interests to bond over!

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