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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Stranded by Gojira
Reminds a lot me and my wife separating. Never gave me reason why.
This is a topic from YOUTUBE. Reply as normal, and we will post it to the user on YouTube.
Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Stranded by Gojira
Reminds a lot me and my wife separating. Never gave me reason why.
It sounds like from the content of the song “stranded” to your situation, there is a lot of relating. You could feel stranded by your wife- left on an Island with no communication or clarity to give you a rescue from the confusion. Without knowing what you did to get you there, you also can’t escape. So you may feel you are left to wander on the island without a rescue plane in sight.
while I understand your situation is more severe, ghosting in our culture has gained so much prevalence that it infects so many relationships. Someone may have a connection and then all of a sudden no contact or response. It doesn’t give either party the chance to really say how they feel, come to an understanding, or move on. When that tab is open without closure, it makes the brain fill in the blanks with all the potential reasons why which doesn’t allow it to heal or move on.
I hope that in this confusion, you can close the loop. That whatever reasons your wife has for separating, even if she never has the courage to communicate with you, you can have peace with yourself for acting in respect and kindness through this season. You don’t have to be stranded. You can find rescue from the fog and the bridge is from healthy communication. I hope peace comes to you and that you learn exactly what you need to through this. I hope you no longer feel stranded and find resolution however that looks like for you.
I’m sorry friend that your relationship ended up in such a brutal way. Of course I don’t know the context that was for both of you at the time, but regardless of it it’s always so painful when someone walks away from you without giving you any reason that would add meaning to their decision. It only leaves you in this foggy place of regret and asking yourself over and over “why”, what happened to get to that point. You try to rewrite the story in your head again and again, but it does feel like being stuck in a place where someone put you, and you have no say on it… which is awful.
The absence of reason and knowledge is torture to the soul, it’s imprisoning, and I can definitely hear how much this Gojira’s song resonates with your heart. To me personally, it relates to a lack of closure too - not with my significant other, but with parents who never took accountability for their violence and the hurt they created in my siblings and I’s lives. We had some heartbreaking and definite conversations where I was confronted to the fact that we were having two separate layers of understanding of the same situation, and I would never get my answers to all the “why” questions that keep spiraling in my mind.
It’s so hard when it feels like someone else holds the keys to your own freedom. That as long as they don’t, can’t or won’t hear you, you would be meant to stay stuck in the same room, banging your head on the walls over and over. It does feel like begging for relief. For getting, finally, the piece of the puzzle that you’re missing and would help you start to grieve, to find closure… to heal. But until then, life feels like trying to run a machine with completely rusty, broken cogs that don’t work together. It doesn’t work and it doesn’t make sense.
This is such a hard place to be in. My heart goes out to you, friend. So thankful you’ve chosen to talk about it today, for there is freedom to find and experience in the very act of sharing our vulnerability, sharing the screams that are saying “please hear me out!” deep inside. It might not open the door immediately, but it surely creates new windows where you can see that there are people out there who hear you, understand you, and are rooting for you from the other side of that room. Little by little, you will find your own keys, you will experience true healing, even if it freaking hurts to be forcefully pushed in this position. One step at a time.
Sending much love your way.
-Marie-Anne