im fucking sick and tired of never being enough i’m always the one getting yelled at getting blamed at my mom cant fucking accept for once she was wrong and just makes me feel useless and stupid and worthless i just dont wanna fucking deal with it i just wanna die wanna be gone don’t wanna deal with the stress the pain anymore i cant fucking take it i just wanna get killed by something i don’t care what anymore why cant i ever be happy as soon as i am my family just has to come and fucking ruin it. But my mom is right about one thing i am the problem always have been so whats the point of living anymore if im the problem.
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Hello friend,
I’m sorry you are feeling this way. Life is difficult, especially when those you are close to are toxic. Even moreso when that toxic person is a parent - it is the parents job to ensure that their child knows that they are loved and that they are wanted. I’m sorry you’re mother doesn’t do this for you.
You are loved, friend. You can’t be so hard on yourself simply because someone (in this case your mother) doesn’t want to take responsibility.
You have every right to be happy - don’t ever let anyone take that from you. I don’t care how large or small the event or thing that makes you happy. The world can be such a harsh place and we need to take our victories when we can. By all means, be happy. If your family won’t share in your happiness, we here certainly will.
May I ask your age? Perhaps there are programs that can help you get out of your environment and into a more positive, constructive ones. Age may factor in on stuff like this.
Hang in there, friend. I have seen that you know happiness and that is a great foothold. I’m glad you want to be happy and you do deserve that as much as anyone else. Just keep fighting, friend. We are here for you.
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Hey friend,
Nope, you are not dying- you are not going anywhere. We need you here. You are going to fight through this, and I hear you. It’s exhausting, heartbreaking, painful, and unfair, but you cannot give up. I hear you. My dad is one of those people who has never in his life apologized to me for the things he’s done wrong- and he’s done some really emotionally hurtful things to me. You know what happiness is. You’ve experienced joy, and we’re going to keep going. We’re going to keep our heads up and keep swimming. Please, please know that we love you here. Please know that there’s light, okay? You’re NOT the problem. You are brave, courageous, and you deserve all the support.
If it is at all possible or accessible, do you think you’d be able to speak with a professional? Someone who is a third party and could help cope with what you’re going through with you mom? It breaks my heart to hear that you have a parent like that, and I truly can empathize with that. I’ve wanted to take my life before because of it, but you and I are not going that way. We are going to survive, and we are going to fucking thrive. You got me? Please, please keep us updated.
We love you. 
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i am only 12 sadly cant just walk outside and go somewhere for help
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I see. 12 is a bit young and does pose some challenges as far as feeling like you have no control over your life or that you can’t make your own decisions.
I don’t know where you live but your English is good so I would like to suggest perhaps looking into the Boys and Girls Clubs of America. This is a program through which you can get a positive adult mentor in your life to help you through your hardships and you will see that there are good people that want you to be happy and succeed if you feel that your family isn’t doing that for you.
Please do remember that we are rooting for you and we all want to see you happy.
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