It can be hard when we relapse. I can totally understand the way your feeling, but I want you to know that I’m still very proud of you. It shows a lot of strength to come here and talk to use about what you’re going through. I know you might feel a lot of guilt and shame right now, but I want you to know that you didn’t fail. You’re still learning how to deal with this addiction and that is a process in which we all fail our way to success. I have relapsed before and I know how easy it is to just want to give up, but the fact that you’re here and that you’re reaching out shows me that you want to really beat this addiction.
There’s a saying I have on my door, I see it every day, it says “Sometimes we win, and sometimes we learn”. This is one of the opportunities that you can learn about what happened. What was the trigger? What are your usual coping mechanisms to try to handle that trigger?
I don’t know if you know, but Heartsupport also has a book about self-harm (ReWrite) and there’s a whole chapter that is dedicated to relapse, it’s actually a chapter that I should read more, because it’s good to know it by heart. It shows some red-flags that might’ve been hanging already, but you might’ve not realized it till it actually happened. It’s a good tool to have, and I do recommend it, if you are open to reading it. I read it with a friend and that helped me a lot, because they kept an eye out on possible triggering moments.
Lastly, I want you to know that I’m very proud of you for being open and honest with us. I want you to know that you are a very strong person, you’ve proven that already and you will continue to prove that to us. Take it 1 day at the time, maybe even 1 second at the time, but I know you can do this.
Feel free to share more if you want to.