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Separation, "Trust-Fund", and Love

Hi, I’m 16, 17 in Dec., I have one full brother, two half brothers, and a half sister (half siblings are my mom’s and adults) my full brother is 19, 20 in Jan.

My dad is an alcoholic stoner, he does weed for pain management and he drinks alcohol because he is not happy. he told me that he isn’t in love with my mom anymore, but I knew he wasn’t happy. He is so kind though, my grandpa is selling all his power plants and dividing up the money, he is going to buy her a house and put the truck in her name. He told me I can choose which parent to go with. It isn’t happening for 6ish months and she don’t know yet. I choose my dad because him and I are the same, but my mom and I fight 24/7 I still love her.

The “Trust-Fund” my dad is dividing his share into 4 and putting it up into a trust for us, my mom, brother, and I.

I’m in love with my best friend he understands me and helps me. I’m the only reason we are not together, I’m mentally unstable but hide it way too well for my family to realize but he does even when I didn’t realize I was in a mood or I switched.

I feel as if everything is okay and I am good I just needed to tell someone because my dad don’t want me to tell anyone and my female best friend lives 5 hours away.

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Sounds like there’s a lot going on in your world, friend…I’m sorry that your parents are splitting :\ I know that it’ll probably end up being a mood-lifter for your folks, and maybe even for you, but divorce is a trauma, and I’m sorry that your family (and you) is/are going through that.

Sucks also that your relationship with your mom is so strenuous, and that you feel cut down by her.

Also on top of that to feel like you’re close with someone and wish you could take the leap but fear what will happen if you do…to not trust yourself, to feel too unstable for love…to feel like there’s something flawed with you and that’s the reason your life isn’t looking the way you wish…all of that really sucks, friend. I’m curious why your dad doesn’t want you to tell anyone…Glad you had the opportunity to share it here so that you could get it off your chest and not keep it locked inside. Also a bummer that your best female friend is so far away…

Feels overall like you’re in this spot of a lot of things that feel like a bummer, but none of them in and of themselves feels terrible, so you don’t even feel the right to claim that you’re not okay, but you’re not because there’s just so many little pieces that add up to this pile of difficulty you’re having to face on your own…that’s a lot of weight to carry on your shoulders…


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okay, so me and my best friend B haven’t started dating yet because of his parents. It is hard to explain, simplest way to put it is they want to see how long i can go without completely breaking down, because i have a history of doing that. i’ll just say now it is every year at the last half of September for reasons. so i know that i’ll stay within a rage of “okay” until then but i feel as if it is going no where and just repeating as if i’m going in circles