SH and OCD are taking control

Hi there,
I’m reaching for tips to deal with SH issues, and OCD.
My bf broke up with me after 3 years together, I stopped self-harming for him, but now that he’s gone, I can’t resist.
I can self-harm twice a day, or not at all… I stayed sober for 4 days recently. I’ve never been further.
Moreover, I had severe OCD recently. I can’t know how to deal with it. Even if I try to go against these thoughts, it’s not working.
I am currently under 1,50g of antidepressant and still sh and think about suicide.
I just need support and comprehension…
Feel free to talk about your experiences, it will be helpful


Hi @lxdlau

I’m so sorry to hear about your break up; I know what that feels like. I also know what it feels like to struggle with self harm. I know how alone you feel and how hurting yourself feels like the only thing that makes sense right now, but in reality, it’s probably the worst thing you can do right now.

It just makes things worse and I think you know that. You stopped for your boyfriend at the time. How did you keep from hurting yourself? What stopped you when you were tempted? Use these coping skills right now for yourself.

I cut for a long time and in the end, it was just added suffering and addiction that didn’t need to be there. I hope that you will see your worth and know that you are enough.


you could rephrase that…
i stopped self-harming.
You did it, he helped motivate you.

That means the ability is in you, that was your accomplishment.
Do it for yourself. Imagine yourself a year from now… imagine remembering how you went so long without it, and what do you want to do now? You wanna do the hard work of staying clean now, so that future you can have it a bit easier.

You got this friend.


From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend, thank you for posting. I am so sorry that your relationship has ended, that is a dreadful time for anyone, it’s a huge wrench and its going to take time to come to terms with, 3 years is a long time. I am sad that you say you stopped your sh for your bf? Don’t get me wrong I am glad you stopped but how I wish you had done it for yourself and I am hoping that maybe in time now you can find the strength to do it for yourself and not for anyone else. You are worth stopping for. You are going to struggle at the moment as you are pretty much grieving the loss of your partner, if your medication isnt working please go and see your Doctor to discuss how to make it right and also how you are feeling, these are the times that a bit of extra help is useful for you. Many times I have been back over the years to see my Doctor had a bit of extra help and then settled back down again after a little while, it all depends on whats happening in life and the effect its having on you. I would also encourage you to find ways refocus your attention when you feel the need to hurt yourself until you can get to see your doctor, we both know that hurting yourself is not a good thing and I don’t want you to do this to you, I think you are worthy of so much more. Please keep in touch and remember you are loved. Lisa x

Tips for coping with urges to self-harm right now - Mind

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From: eloquentpetrichor

Hello, lxdlau! I’m so sorry to hear about your break up. What was the motivation behind you stopping before? Was it a desire to make your bf happy? Whatever motivation you had to stop for him you deserve to stop for yourself as well. I hope you are able to find that within yourself again. You stopped once and I believe you can do it again. Are you in therapy as well as taking the antidepressant? If so maybe your therapist can help you find that reason to stop for yourself. I’m sorry that I do not have more insight to how to help you but I think you can do it. Please continue to come back and share with us during this journey. We’re always here for you. Stay strong and keep fighting :hrtlegolove:

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From: SuchBlue

Hi lxdlau,

It’s good that your boyfriend motivated you to stop self-harming, and because of it you got one step further. You managed to stay sober for 4 days, and while that might not seem like a lot, it’s still better than nothing. Now it’s time to motivate yourself and see how much you can do when you don’t self-harm. About your severe OCD and antidepressant, you might want to get that checked out by a professional.

Feel free to update us with how you do, we’d be glad to hear it :hrtlegolove:


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